woke up this morning and my foot really properly hurts!!
went to work, feels like its broken - but only has a small bruise on it....hurts like fook tho!

now the weird thing is when I went to bed it was fine, never left the house yesterday or played footy or owt......never had any wild intercourse with mrs S either



I wondered at first if its the onset of arthritis in me foot, but now i'm thinking I might have sleep walked and knacked it, cos it does feel broken.....




any doctors/sleep experts in?!

If it continues you should think of maybe getting it checked out

Having said that I'm guilty of not going to the quacks for me aches and pains
I've been rubbing Ibuprofen gel on the bottom of my right shin bone for about a fortnight, always seems to knack if I'm walking about.
There was a hyowge nasty bruise on it after the dog ran into me at full pelt chasing a cat. There's still a big lump there though the bruising's gone - doesn't seem right to me

Could be gout !!!! (people who like a good tipple, etc etc)

I'm told the pain from gout is unbelievably horrendous

shin splints

on the top of the foot?? ..........were talking big toe 'metatarsal' here

Hmm. Arthritis doesn't cause bruises tho, does it? I guess you did it yesterday and were too......erm, you were concentrating on something else and didn't notice.

Honestly at this rate we're going to have to set up a bunker ward for invalids.....

you mean pissed??!!

I wasn't though, and really cant remember hurting it.........like I say its weird!

I'm going with a sleepwalking incident meself, even though I dont think i've ever sleepwalked before!

Have you checked your stools?

parmo?!

Are you Gillian McKeith in disguise Cornelius?

shin splints? I've heard of spare ribs!!!

Would you eat human ribs?

Cooked obviously, not raw cos that would be a bit sick.

Nice back passage!

what sauce would you recommend?

I'd get it taken off Salty, just in case.

Get what taken off Salty? The sauce? Human ribs in Salty Sauce?

You have foot and mouth shot the fooker,

helpful bastaaards!!

I have a hot water bottle on it just now, and have sprayed it with deep heat...........stinks in here now


Mrs.S is being no help at all, not even giving me favours to take my mind off it....nevermind a cup of tea!

day 3 of the mystery foot injury.....



still knacking like fook, no bruising or owt
climbing ladders was agony, AGONY I tells ya...

and it s no fun being a standy-up drummer with a hurty foot either....the things you do eh?

if its still like it on Monday I think I'll have to get it checked

use RICE.

Rest

Ice

Compression

Elevation

fried or boiled?

The man's right.
Deep Heat and hot water bottles make it feel instantly better but do nothing other than that.
When athletes or footballers knack themselves they dont rush on with a hot water bottle do they?
Thats what my mother in law told me the other month when I did my back in.
Ice is what you need. It reduces inflamation
So the rest of his advice is prob good too

I've knacked my foot, too, now, or at least a heavily overweight Newcastle person did, by inexplicably walking backwards.
Unlike Salty, I am very observant and notice the sources of my accidents

which foot?
we could do the three-legged race!!!



day 4 of the mystery foot injury:

still hurty but not as bad.....been doing the 'rice' thing but also a bit of work untill it snowed


all I can say is AYAZ!

Ice is only of any real use if applied immediately after the injury (it causes the blood vessels to contract and therefore reduces bleeding into the tissues subsequently reducing the swelling)

I'd recommend red wine and when you run out of that see if you've got any gin at the back of the drinks cupboard.

It's me right foot. But it's better to-day, so just as well I had a moan straight away .



Excuse me but what's AYAZ? For the untrendy among us, like....

did that yesterday only with sherry, hence the bad gerrard video trick I played.....









Grabey, AYAZ is that sound you make when you hurt yerself...............AYAZ!!!!!!!!

you probably say OW!

It might be AYAZ in Saltburn, but in Hartlepool its AYATCH.

In Durham, it's buggerit

Well how come you never spotted a big geordie bloater dancing on your slingbacks then??

thats my Teesside roots rearing its ugly head!


my half german friend says OWAH!

sometimes I use it too......

The frogs say AIEeee-UH!!

Or sometimes "oh la la la la la la la la" which sounds I can't tell you how fookin' silly and/or gay.

If you must know the big geordie bloater had just gone to take his seat on the train when, for reasons best known to himself, he quickly reversed again on to my foot.

Very similar to here. You can make your way around with four Chinese sounds.

Aie-ah!! (surprise)
Aie-or!! (disapproval)
Ah?? (pardon??)
Oh!! (OK)

Piece of piss!!

Did you knack him??

RACIST!

I glared at him, Spender. That was enough. He quailed in a satisfying sort of way

He QUAILED?

The thing about AIEeee-UH is the louder you say the "UH" part at the end the more you are reproaching somebody. If you stub your toe, for example, the "UH" part is almost silent, but if you push a needle under someone's fingernail the response will sound more like aiee-UUUURRRRHHHHHHHHHH!

Surely it's underdoing it a bit to reproach a torturer? There must be a more appropriate syllable for that

Yes

Aye and similarly, the longer the '-ahh' sound the bigger the surprise and the longer the '-orr' sound the more disapproval you're expressing.

The more you repeat 'oh' the more you understand, and the louder the 'ah?' the less you've heard.

Told yer!! Easy!!

"AYAHFOOKA" Is correct terminolgy in Hartlepudilianese

I didn't realise....... the Millhouse are bi-lingual

Nice tongues.

day 5 of the mystery foot injury:


does feel a bit better today thanks to...well.....you know how you crack your knuckles? well I can crack my ankle due to an old footy injury. so there I was watching telly and I cracked my ankle...decided to see if I could crack the troubled area, and lo! I could and although it hurt then, feels a bit better today, less pain and not as stiff [oo-er].....

what d'ya reckon?
ligament?
or bone?

is your leg still attatched?

aye, just about....gotta clicky hip!