Sitting in the sun after putting some fencing up and there’s a very, very strange noise coming over from next doors fence…..what’s going on over there says the wife, have a look…… so I saunter over casually ..walk up to the fence and before my very eyes see they’re having it away hammer and togs……the noise was horrendous and the wife said do something, so I thought fuck it, get the hose out,fuck em the dirty sods… this is well out of order …they’re a fucking nuisance wood pigeons when they have their nest ready.

I had a couple of gulls at it the other day on the flat. I am sure the male was shouting "of course i love ya!

Now give us me chips back!

We've all been there- I know I have!