I’ve heard that eighties top man Howard Jones has bought into Pools. Anyone heard anything?

Wouldn’t it be good!

I heard it was the Fun Boy Three..

I don't believe it.

Things can only get better.

I heard the Gang of Four have made a massive investment so, to hell with poverty, could be time for some entertainment. Hope it isn't all just a killing joke though.

i,m lost. not got a clue what anyone is talking about.

Don't worry mate, it comes under taking the piss or winding up. choose either.

Fun fact
Young Howard Jones in his pre-fame days was a correspondent with the customer service lasses at my job in Sedgefield.
They sold the clingfilm, he rang up to order it.

Another fun fact is that the line "throw off your mental chains" was written to encourage Loids to liberate themselves from their Feethams habit.

Anyway, more importantly, what was the scruffy haired pervert getting up to with all that cling film?

He wrapped it around his face like a bank robber to look a bit less like Martin Gore.

Except that was nick Kershaw

Shocking fake music news from the Bunker's own Boris Johnson and here's the proof-


Reckon Kershaw is skint now though, sitting alone in a grubby white suit trying on mullet wigs. Can't be him investing.

Ah well, light touch paper and stand well back. Even if I did get my lyrical reference wrong.....

I thought that was the point of your riddle.

Though that too is Nick Kershaw.