Remember at the back end of last season I spoke to you about the state of the seats twice and you said twice, that you will pass it on to the ground staff, I`m guessing you forgot huh?

Shall I send the new gaffer an e-mail to ask why the seats are covered in shit and STILL no numbers on, I bet if it was your seat it would be cleaned!!

How on earth do you expect new season ticket holders and pay on the day to know where they are sitting when the seats have no numbers, or two numbers, season ticket holder turns up just before start of game, a couple and 2 kids are in his seat, " Excuse me pal, your in my seat", " How do you know that"?, "Because I have been sat there 3 years", " Oh okay mate", Steward, do you know where seat 112 is in row d, steward scratches head, walks aimlessly up and down and says, " Just sit there mate"

Season ticket holder turns up and groundhog day

if your strapped, I`ll bring my own pen and get it done before Saturday!!!!

What has the media manager got to do with the state of the seats?

Do you want him to do a feature on them for the website? Not saying it isn't an issue but I think you're telling the wrong person.

Because he is the person I spoke to, point of contact and he had Greens ear and now Coxhall, does that clarify it for you?

He probably did pass it on but it's not his job, it's like asking Craig Hignett to sort it.

It's a small club, I'm sure Mark will pass it on.

Communication is the art of receiving, understanding and transferring information, as a media man, i`m sure he understands, not sure tenacity is his strength though!

I've passed on the info again regarding the seats. Just as I did last season. For what it's worth, I agree - it's not good enough that they aren't clean, they should be.

Prior to the game next week the seats will all be cleaned and will also be freshly labelled with their appropriate numbers.

Apologies about the problems today - and for my lack of tenacity.

Now, let's have a brilliant season.

Fair play Mark.

And produce a programme for friendly games

Why bother with the cost? I doubt a programme makes money for League games it's produced because it's the done thing and expected. I really don't see the merit of one for a friendly that's attended by next to nobody and an even smaller percentage of them being people who'd buy one.

Hate to say this but f. hell, didn't you just get that totally wrong

Well done Mark. Maybe you could do a pools world video of the guy breaking his back cleaning all them seats just to keep Monkeybutt happy?

How exactly, it's not Marks fault is it? He was accused of not passing on a complaint, he confirmed he did.

Mark do u prefer Duchamps or Happy Socks?

WTF?
"What has the media manager got to do with the state of the seats?"
You implied speaking to Mark was a waste of time. How is he a worse contact than anybody else? Just drop it FFS.
Ta.

I didn't imply at all that speaking to him in the first place was a waste of time, that is an assumption on your part, I just don't think he deserves the comeback when the complaint was followed through when it isn't his job. The op clearly suggests he didn't pass it on, he confirmed he did.

I happen to think Mark Simpson in a pretty rubbish period in terms of results for the club and things going on behind the scenes is one of the few who has been consistently good at his job.

I think we all know the answer to that...

The problem with the question Mr Tree is as a media man Mark would not wish to alienate yloop and Joe Mac by telling the truth!!!!!!

Thank you.

Now about that commentator today

Mark can you ensure the catering staff's hands are washed at least biannually and that there is a safe meeting point for those connecting with minors on CB radios.

the seats were partially cleaned, the soil/muck/even weeds were cleaned out of the small holes in every seat the thick pigeon/seagull guano was cleaned off the majority of seats on a number of days leading up to both the Sunderland and Scunthorpe games. Perhaps you think someone should sit there and follow the seagulls /pigeons with toilet rolls and clean up every drop as it falls. Put you seat number on here and I'll personally supply your seat with some cling film which you can remove on the first match so you have a clean seat . This will only be done on condition that at end of every home game you place fresh cling film on your seat to ensure some seagull doesn't guano on it.

How do I know the seats were cleaned of guano and holes of each seat (1.549) were cleaned as described because I personally did them,

Now if you can tell not only Pools but every sporting club in the WORLD how to stop pigeon guano falling on out door seating your guaranteed to become a multi millionaire

Don't Crystal Palace or someone have an Eagle/Kesterel or some rock hard bird of prey, who they bring in to sort out the problem/frighten the vermin away?

Do I win a Million?

What happens if the Eagle shits on monkeybutts Seat?

Well my eyesight isn`t failing enough not to be able to distinguish dirt on seats Robert, the guy 4 seats from me approached Mark on Saturday also regarding dirty seats, we didn`t mention guano and I don`t expect someone to clean them every week, what I would expect is somebody to CHECK them weekly and any with shite on be cleaned.
I don`t sit in the first three rows either which would get shat on, unless the gulls are swooping and bombing the higher up rows

Just admit you missed a few when you partially cleaned them

Partially cleaned...

Half a job Bob

You should get a partial free ticket now


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I don't mind telling you I have laughed my head off all day, sometimes at inopportune moments, at this thread!!! Fucking Bunker Gold!!!

I still don't know what it is!


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Cadburys Boost has seagull shit in

That would take it to the limit

Good point Mr B. I have had a restless night thinking about this, and all I can imagine is there may be a difference between Guano and Eagle shit! You know, size, viscosity etc. Also clingyness may be a factor vis a vie cleaning products and elbow grease required.

This is a major issue and my suggestion is the club appoint a Guano specialist from Brazil (Guano sounds Brazilian to me) or somewhere. It would surely be worth an extra couple of hundred quid on a season ticket or sell a player, for his/her wages, just for the cleanliness and the piece of mind!

Partially cleaned

Just spotted Bob driving.

Bob above with his partial mop & bucket!

by partially cleaned I meant that all the seats were not cleaned but those with pigeon shit (most will understand what that is) were cleaned if they didn't have shit on them they were left. All the holes in the seats were cleaned out over a couple days for every seat. All the seats will be cleaned and washed on Wednesday and hopefully as mentioned previously will be renumbered for the first game of the season.

Yubep please feel free to call in anytime you want and either give a hand or alternatively ask what is actually done, Once more donate the equivalent of £6 per hour to a charity of my choice and I will happily work at Pools for nothing , the £6 PER HOUR IS BELOW MINIMUM WAGE but at least you'll be working for next to nothing then we both would have. You have yet to reply to this request on a number of times, you want others to work free but won't yourself, so as politely as I can shut the f**k up about what I get for the work I do.

Perhaps next season the trust can offer the service of a some of their members . Free of course, least they'll be giving the club something back, something I and others have done for many seasons

Help around the ground, turnstile operators, stewards all free and supplied by the trust will save the club thousands per season. I await for you(yubep) to volunteer but then again you don't actually go to the games do you.

Bob.... Chill out man, you should know this place by now.

Bob i'd like to suggest that...


Thats my partial reply to your partial cleaning of the seats.

I'm not going again until Yubep starts donating £6 an hour to charity.

I only partially read his post so i didnt get to that bit.

Im not joining the Trust till it starts ordering how its members spend their free time and also their match days.

I mean the thought of joining a Hartlepool United Football Trust only appeals to me if Im then asked to stand on the turnstile/with my back to the match so I cant watch the club I love.

Or Mr Tree you could be a volounteer steward and turn your back on the game to check the socks of supporters.

Just saying like!

Just do it but only partially do the work your asked to do... Whilst getting full rewards


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Bob and his mate having a rest after partially cleaning the Seat!

Just witnessed Mark's self service skills in Sainsbury's. Happy to report it was a complete and not partial success, top work!

Was there guano in the basket?

Sadly not, although there was a tinned, poached seagull.

I have been away for a few days so have missed all of this. But having read it, is the summary about this:

Bob has suggested that it should be the Trust members responsibility to partially clear pigeon shit from the seats, and that they would be paid £6 per hour, but would donate that to Bob?

Ah right. Thought so.

Is this pay to for Bob season ticket?

When for did you to learn Welsh?