Piss?.

Apart from what is served at most local bars these days that is.My brother served me some Robinsons Barley Water diluted with his own personal piss,on a caravan holiday up in Scotland,when i was 7.

The guy across the road in Ventnor Ave,where i grew up, used to drink his own slash as a health tonic,apparently its good for you.Though i always wondered why my dad refused cups of tea at their house,and come to think of it,cigars at Crimbo&New Year.

Not me.

Who is the bloke on Ventnor Avenue, I might know who it is?

Not yet, how can it b good for you? It's just waste isn't it.....?

Yes, a whole pint back in 1995 for a pound bet.

The taste is OK (my own) but it's the warmth that is a bit weird.

I drank a pint of it!!

Funny the things you do for a bet when your drunk, and want to ingratiate yourself with the local RAOB Lodge.

At least I didn't take part in the 'willy' measuring contest, you've got to know your limitations.

Errrr...can't say i have like

Tommy Fountain...yes his real name

Thats how i was able to do it, mine tasted better than all the pints of Hansa I had drank when I was home on leave.

What happened to Harp? They rebranded it as Oirish lager a few years ago then disappeared.

I used to like their adverts. The little lizard going 'hot, hot, hot' - time for a sharp exit.

I think that they have the Irish version funnily enough in the Irish Bar on the Marina

I knew Tommy and his family, never had him down as a pish taker tho

Piss ice pops don't sound too bad when you consider that liqurice is made from beatles blood and garibauldi;s are full of dead blue bottles........

Do you drink it with those parmo things? When you come to Leeds we are likely to offer you Tetley's - we can arrange for it to be served luke warm though no problem. Should we add salt?

I met some Submariners who did much worse things than drink their own piss.

An ex workmate of mine told me one of his 'old navy mates' could fit a boiled egg under his foreskin

Quail, Hen. Duck, Ostrich?

Hen, i believe, but thats still an achivement

We were in a restaurant last night and our rass dropped something off the plates on the table into my bowl. So I picks it up and eats it, thinking it was tofu. Didn't taste like tofu, so I said 'what was that??'

'Pig's stomach............'

no you fookin should not!

I'm saying feck all!!!!

You probably dip cheese sandwiches in piss and eat them.

A long time ago, a long way away from here, I attended a friend of mine's 21st birthday celebrations at a rugby club after a game. He was given two pints of "top shelf" to down in one.

Being a big strapping lad, he downed the first, no problem, got most of the way down the second and swiftly spewed the lot back into his pint pot.

He then went on to down the pint of steaming vomit and there was even stretchy cling ons hung between his mouth and the glass.

It is the single, most disgusting thing I have EVER seen. I still baulk today when I think of it and I feel like chundering now after writing this.

Anyway, the afore mentioned gentleman, who shall remain nameless, was then kidnapped by the opposition rugby team, taken back to Crewe on their team coach, but sonehow made it back to the town we were drinking in, which shall remain nameless, before last orders.

Not bad going.

Chaz Treasure.

I was in the Army with him in Belfast, he was the son of the Dean of Salisbury Cathedral and an inveterate piss artist.

One night in 1976, the revoltingly hot summer that happened before Global Warming and seemed to be OK then, anyway, I was DJ-ing in the Unit Club and needed a gypsys. So I put a long record on, probably 'I Feel Love' by Donna Summer, and went off to the lavs which were outside the building.

I'm in mid stream when in staggers Chaz, pissed as a cricket, and goes to the trough next to me. He starts having a jimmy, coughs up a greeny, spits it down the trough, says 'phwoar what a beauty,' rescues it, holds it up for me to see, then puts it back in his mouth chews and swallows. All without stopping pissing. 31 years later I still gyp.