i once played football with chip fireball

I've played football with Yubep who once played footy with Chip Fireball

I once read one of Joe Macs status's on Facebook and he once played with Yubep who played with Chip Fireball.

I was surprised to find out that one day whilst on Poolie Bunker Tree had read one of my Facebooks status's about me playing Football with Yubep who once played with Chip Fireball.

Joe Mac once addressed me on the Poolie Bunker and I once read his facebook status about him playing fooptball with Yubep who once played football with THE chip fireball.

I once told the great poet and shite librarian Philip Larkin to fuck off.

He must have taken the hint then. No-one ever saw him while I was at Hull.

Anyway, I might make a poem out of all this fame, if I find a minute or two.
Any claims to fame posted after midnight to-night will be disallowed.

He spent a lot of his time up in Haydon Bridge shagging.

Don't call me shagging.

Sorry. I meant it in a respectful way.

I Posted mine early morning Grabec, im a longway away.please take this into account Mrs bloody Terry Wogan

Who are you calling Mrs bloody Terry Wogan? I might not include you now.

Anyway, I meant next midnight is the cut-off line. Your post is here already, even if it is a pack of lies.

Bruce Lee was in here tonight asking for a waiters job. Apparently his Mam is our cook and he's fallen on hard times.

Hello people,

Thanks for the shout-out Grabec. I still read this board every few days, but haven't posted for a year or two because I don't get to games anymore. In answer to Chip's suggestion of probably not writing for fame, well I won't disagree with that. It didn't get me started. But having had brilliant reviews for two books but received fook-all money I wouldn't mind a bit of fame as well now. Still, I presume Chip appreciates that as much as anyone, with his musical background.
Anyone in Durham, feel free to pop into our free exhibition, next door to the Gala Theatre - about how me and a photographer followed the route the monks took fleeing Lindisfarne from Vikings with the body of St Cuthbert and the Lindisfarne Gospels in his coffin.
Up the Pools! Down with big useless centre forward lumps!
I once played football with Yubep as well...

Agree entirely there Chip.
I was talking to the sculptor Fenwick Lawson today. He had a chance for a studio in Kensington and Chelsea, taking work from Jacob Epstein and making a fortune into the bargain. But he would have had to do a particular form of sculpture and so he refused, and said he would continue carving trees. I find that inspiring...
The most important thing is doing the best I can - certainly when it comes to my books. If people or publishers don't like it then that's kind of tough. Publishers wanted me to turn Andalucia into a novel because they said it stood a better chance of selling. And so I told them no and formed my own publishing company instead. I'm not going to sell my soul to them.
Myself and Paul Alexander Knox (a great photographer from Easington) marched with the EDL and then marched with the Anti Fascists afterwards, interviewing them both. Vice Magazine changed my title and replaced it with a shite one, took a few quotes out (for the sake of imbalance) and picked photographs neither I nor Paul would have chosen. But that's magazines/papers for you...

I'd pay money for depressing shit like that.
I love depressing shit me; good quality depressing shit...

Rich good to see you still breathing. I will have to visit the exhibition as I think it's a load of bollocks the carrying around of his body and other artefacts all in the name of mind control, fear and power. I have read a few things about it before and the church v 'Viking' conflict so will be interested to see what you say. Stop pissing about with religion and politics young man and get back to (very good) observant knowledgable social comedy. I am still waiting for the tv mini series, like Tracey Beaker with drugs.

The rest of you who can read get your hands on Kicked Out his first book and easily in my top 100 books. And I have read a lot.

Didn't know you'd wrote that Chip, I listened to most of the XFM podcasts Ricky Gervais done when I was on holiday last year and remember when this song came on

Hello BWH. You should pop in more often and let us know how you're getting on.

Don't know whether you know there's an exhibition of Fenwick Lawson's work in the Durham Heritage Museum (in North Bailey), some lovely preliminary sketches and sculptures. I love his work, too.
Haven't seen your own exhibition yet but intend to go soon. It's probably my favourite bit of history. (Don't think you've got it quite right, Katcha, about the mind control, fear and power. That was the Vikings, not Cuthbert!)

Chip, your song is lovely and I'm going to buy it if I can find it. I'm not sure why you got the impression that I was promoting fame over substance. I thought you knew me better than that! I was using the word 'famous' in a non-literal sense.

As a matter of fact, I take notice of hardly any media-defined famous people. There 's an enormous amount of talent in the north-east..writers, musicians, artists etc. I've got my work cut out keeping up with them, never mind the Brad Pitts of the world!

I've just been filmed for French telly. From a helicopter.

I heard you were a fair size but you must be massive if they need to use a helicopter to get a decent shot.

Not necessarily. They have a helicopter for Montalbano and he's very short.

Was it as they winched you up to safety.....?:

Thanks Katcha and Grabec.
Please do come down and see the exhibition.

Colin, I agree much of history is bollocks, written with agenda and bias, and I would probably agree with most of your thoughts on religion too. I wouldn't call myself Christian personally. I'm heading in a pagan direction.
The exhibition is mostly a photographic portrayal of our journey following the monks journey. The writing reflects, compliments or contrasts the photography. My work is in the next few months writing the book - and that will have much more personal opinion and critical opinion in.

How much of the journey is true, we will never know. But I think its fair to say the Lindisfarne Gospels and the body of St Cuthbert were saved by the community who underwent this journey.
They started in 875, took seven years to reach Chester le Street, stayed there 112 years, then went to Durham.
Of course, that's presuming we believe the story, written in the 12th century by Symeon, a man with a mission and a wont for inventing miracles. Certainly, they weren't simply fleeing terrified monks chased by nasty brutish vikings - they were a rich and powerful church galvanising christianity by visiting their own estates and own kingdom at a crucial time.

I don't believe many of the miracles myself - but what I find very interesting (and sad) is how Cuthbert has been changed and manipulated throughout history to suit the church's aims...keeping themselves in power... land, riches and spiritual power.

All this will be a feature of the book (which will be full of lots of photography).Basically, I do believe some of the early stories of Cuthbert, written when he was alive or just after - that he was a humble peace loving man and a lover of nature in the traditional manner of Celtic monks - who to some were descended from druids in a number of ways. He was always kind and never had a bad word to say about others, giving them advice but respectfully.

By the time of the Viking invasion in 9th century and the Norman Conquest in 11th he was striking people down (even though he'd been dead for hundreds of years) and deciding the outcomes of wars. He was aggressive because the community needed him to be...to keep themselves in power. Incoming kings gave him due reverence because it kept the Northumbrians on their side and made revolt less likely.

Five hundred years ago this September 15,000 Scots were massacred in four hours at the Battle of Flodden, with the English forces marching under the banner of St Cuthbert. Many more battles had him leading the English.

When his tomb was opened in Durham Cathedral in the 1800's and 1900's a number of the relics in there were stolen and sold on.

I think Cuthbert would have thought all this disgusting personally. As someone who was the most powerful saint in the land for six hundred years and is still the patron saint of the north, he could be an example to us all. One thing he understood was the need for balance, for long periods of isolation that meant, when returning to society he could be better equipped mentally to deal with it and help others. But he's been manipulated and re-invented to keep certain people and the church in power.

This comes as a bit of a blow to my ego but apparently they were actually filming some kind of bike race.