Can't get signed in. Have followed their instructions for cookies and all that but still no joy. Is everybody else signing in alright?

No probs here, M'sieur. Have you tried switching it off, then on again?

Anymore of that and I'll send you round for a session watching Tucker's parents

This gets odder. I can hear if I use Swindon's commentary


...sort this out, Cooper!

Commentary back & they score

of course, I meant miss!

Tommy, we love you!!!!!

Relying on the written commentary on BBC Tees- they appear to mostly ignore the events of the game so it's fairly stress free. Says unfair challenge by Steve Howard on...fairly often which has to be good thing.

Was the penner actually missed or was it saved?

Fook me he really did miss a penna? Bollocks to your not celebrating antics, refusing to score against Pools is proper loyalty. Old Paolo Mussolini must be going mental- give him a few verses of Bandiera Rossa and his head will explode. Come on Pools!

Some good amusement today. Liverpool three nowt down; QPR four nowt down at home to Swansea.
Round 1 of the manager exchange goes to Swansea.

Says missed on the Tees commentary M Monty so I'm none the wiser as it seems to be getting made up by a bored child who isn't at the match. Best bit so far is "In-swinging corner..." and then didn't say what happened to it.

I think that's prolly the same commentary as big beeb. :shrug:
I especially liked "The referee gives a against Antony Sweeney for handball."

Just had 'Centre by Nathan Luscombe' with nothing after it- ball must be hanging in the wind today.

The mere words Nathan & Luscombe should be reward enough, chaps

Well that was one point better than a lot of people expected. How about we just settle for drawing all the home games we lost last season.

Happy enough with a point against Swindon and a big plus is that Luscombe must be looking fitter- they didn't call him the heavily boned Nathan Luscombe or anything.

Nice positive spin there, sir!

That's the spirit

Match ended with a commentary highlight from the BBC as well:

"The game is over, as the referee blows his whistle." It's as if they're painting a picture with words.

Might I suggest next time (if there is one), you try the SportingLife live text. It's pretty much in the same vein but they do finish their sentences and chuck in an occasional "Hartlepool are in control of the game. Key player: Michael Barron."

That does sound a lot better, thanks Monsieur.