I've got a heavy cold and it feels like it's turning into man Flu.. I'me finding it difficult to smoke and haven't fancied a can for days....Anyone got a good remedy

Beer and fags

You're turning into a southern puff.... sorry I forgot you already are one!

Get some Beechams Powders down ya', they always work for me.

Try my gran's special cure*

A nice big mug of warm arsenic followed by a bottle of vodka and 50 paracetamol should sort you out Sussex.
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*Previously sold under the name and slogan 'Granny Toulouse's Old Fashioned Loid Treatment- Humane, Effective and Permanent'.

Chortle! Would that have any impact on a chain-smoking meths drinker?

Feeling a lot better today thanks ..I can even taste the apples in my can of Strongbow ..

If you can taste apples in the synthetic dog-piss that is Strongbow, then you may have permanent damage.

Glad the man flu's gone tho. Nasty ailment, that.

What would know about taste you being half french?

Sussex.......dont forget as you lift the Strongbow up to your mouth.........do us all a favour and release the arrow.