Dwayne Doyle, a turner and lathe operator with precision engineering company Machine Tech, was sacked this afternoon for working on his car during working hours ..... might as well get these things out of the way first eh?

YOU ABSOLUTE BARSTEWARD SNOWY!

When I saw the title I initially thought it would be a wind-up. Then for some strange reason when I saw you were the author I actually believed it.

When I read the top line of yours, I naturally thought you were our lass using her favourite 'greeting' to me ...let's be honest, I'm past taking the club seriously the way things are going at present, so let's just laugh at the approach of the 'relegationberg' it's getting bigger and closer by the week and we're on the Titanic, with the emphasis on the 'Tit'......

I struggle to take the club seriously too but removing Turner now would have launched a torpedo to the oncoming iceberg.

Captain Chris is on the bridge clutching his sextant, wondering, 'do we go left round the berg or right round the berg' and gives it is consideration ..... and then decided to apparently go through the berg... Oh dear, he should be told.

....and when the f*cker sinks Hodcroft will pick him up in his nuclear sub, towel him dry, fetch his slippers and prepare a feast for the c*nt

... and as he steps ashore in Division two, he'll have another cunning plan hatching in his brain, another division another challenge!! ............. oh dear.

And his newly amended CV will merely blame the iceberg acquitting Turner of any culpability.

He'll blame global warming... and the fans lukewarming....

He'll say the fans never really backed us in big enough numbers when we needed to kick on, placed mid-table at Christmas....

....or some other load of gumf like that.

He may blame Paul Stephenson!