Yes my word you may well ask what it is, this theory
of mine. Well, this theory that I have--that is to say, which is mine--
...is mine.

What this club needs and is certain to provide the results it needs is.............


This theory goes as follows and begins now.

We need a Hairdresser!


That is my theory, it is mine, and belongs to me and I own it, and what it is too

Evidence of My Theory! (no 1),

Nelson, get your hair cut son , you lokk like a male porn star.

Brown get your hair cut, the hair bands and especially nets are for putting balls into.......

historical evidence, Westy with his neat plaited curls, from some pleated girl, ....sent of 8min from championship....

ECG's from seasons ago..." I ain't getin my hair cut whilst this record winning win feast goes on.....

I rest my case , the club needs a hairdresser......

more evidence... we lost on sat at leeds, me and fensy had our hair cut on monday, we draw on tuesday........

That is my theory, it is mine, and belongs to me and I own it, and what it is too.

so it was £1 a pint in the millhouse then

Does it have to be a club hairdresser?

I need a haircut and will get it done before Saturday if you think it will help. Unfortunately, there's no way I can get to Hartlepool to get it done so it will be an unofficial cut. Your own trim seemed to help and the club haven't appointed a hairdresser yet.

PS If we have to have official club haircuts couldn't they be done by a club barber instead?

thats a fine idea a club hair cut!, possibly included with a season ticket, as long as the style reflects the image of of the club....
but then .. do the Hair follicle challenged have to wear wigs?

Wilson should stick to his theory about brontosauruses

Maybe Brownies hair could be the model for the new club haircut. Most people would take a while to achieve that length so they would need to rush to the club shop to buy an official James Brown Wig. No official club hair- no admission. People who are coppers, soldiers etc could then whip it off before returning to duty with their short haired outfits.

A waterproof membrane could be inserted for paddock dwellers, then they wouldn't need to get the annoying umbrellas out.

David Prutton off of Leeds United has the best hair in the modern game........he looks like he should be the fifth member of Kings Of Leon.................if he grew a beard, he would be a dead ringer for our lord Jesus Christ.

But isn't Jepus dark skinned....

Who's Jepus? Ronnie Jepson? But he's ginger isn't he?

Neil Armstrong???

I always thought Ronnie Jepson was a cracking centre forward - a player I'd love to have seen at Pools.
We were having some banter with him from behind the goal at Exeter before they took a corner, while a player was receiving treatment for an injury
"Ow Ronnie - you look like Joe Allon"
Him:" Nah I'm not that good looking"!
"Would you sign for Pools then?"
" Aye I fancy a move back up north"

Lance Armstrong?