Play safe tonight children!!

We dont want any accidents

And remember POK, always return to a lit firework.

I shouldnt laugh but..

Especially them 'fountain' ones......they hurt the face in i heard!!

You know that 1960's trick of inserting a firework into a cat and then lighting it??...........

Even I don't hate cats that much.

We used to pour milk over dogs .... doesn't half stink when they dry out.

Our next door neighbour always goes over the top with the biggest bangs on the night, veritable fookin landmines. As I came in tonight, our lass was going on about it and dreading the noise .. So I told her when I pulled up he was unloading six boxes marked 'Scud rockets' from his van...
"Are they the noisy ones?" she asked. .....

can you remember when a firework would,nt go off and you used to make a genie,well we bought some dud bangers so my mate tried making a genie only he was'nt quick enough and when he looked up he had no eyebrows

There was that Head Teacher who was letting off the school fire work display. One of the mortars didn't go off so he had a look down the tube to see what had gone wrong.......bang.......brown bread!

thats how they make brown bread?!
no wonder it tastes shit

Bloody hell. Not a good thing for the kids to see

being from West View, we would have all thought it was cool!!!

..his head wouldn't have been, well what they found of it anyway.

Obviously we don't have bommy night here, all that stuff happens at Chinese New Year. You can be wandering along, munching on a duck beak and suddenly summat very hot, swift and fluorescent takes your glasses off. It's a residential hazard. The perpetrator just wees himself laughing.

The H&S brigade would have a heart attack. They have these firecrackers that are up to 30 foot long and they just roll 'em on the pavement and light one end. Thirty minutes later, a cloud of dense smoke, a shower of red tissue paper and two week tinnitus tells you that it's done.

Then, next door comes out..................

Mr Frodraff experienced this in his hotel back in February.

Queer buggers like, There was bangers (fireworks not the Church Street kind) all over the place. Seemed before they opened the shops after the New year holidays they let a salvo off to drive the demons away. Not that they believed in them like but where making money is concerned it's best not to take a chance.

Great trip and a great way to control pigeons......you eat them.....not a pigeon in sight, lots of feathers like.