I punched Lily Allen in the kipper then Kate 'Carole King' Nash in the kipper, how long would I get and would it be worth it??

it might be worth it for us as you will have restricted internet access . i dont think spending time in prison would be worthwhile like, for the short time of happiness you'd get once you had sparked them out .

the thing what fecks me off about Lily Allen is shes always banging on about her dad (well she has the radio interviews ive heard) and hes a fecking 1st class prick, who does he think he is some kind of cockerney wide boy

I reckon if you went to town on 'em with a cricket bat you wouldn't get any longer and so it's a matter of cause and response innit??

Write off 18 months, out in five 'cos the nicks full, cash for lost B&B, nice ankle bracelet and then sell your story to the Sun.

Do you want an agent??