Funny moment....

monkeybutt · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 3:47 pm

just met a woman with one leg named Eileen, couldn`t make it up really :laugh:

Block B Blues · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 5:37 pm

What was her other leg named? bbolt

yloop · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 5:38 pm

Guess you had to be there.

PJPoolie · **Joined:** Wed Mar 06, 2013 6:28 pm **Posts:** 15342

How would a person with one leg lean?

Hilarious stuff apart from it not making sense have you considered after dinner speaking?

ptbap · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 5:55 pm

Do you need two legs to lean against a wall? Reckon if I stood on one leg I could stand close to a wall and lean against it.

PJPoolie · **Joined:** Wed Mar 06, 2013 6:28 pm **Posts:** 15342

Bringing walls into the equation will not make this funny.

ptbap · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 6:16 pm

Just answering your question!

PJPoolie · **Joined:** Wed Mar 06, 2013 6:28 pm **Posts:** 15342

If anything pointing out that one legged people can lean if a wall is available makes this anequdote LESS funny (yes, I know

) as leaning is not exclusive to people with two or one legs.

If you are telling this one later Mr Butt change her name to Peggy and you'll probably only be asked to get your coat rather than the full tumbleweed treatment.

monkeybutt · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 8:36 pm

PJPoolie wrote:

How would a person with one leg lean?

Hilarious stuff apart from it not making sense have you considered after dinner speaking?

When she stands up, the weight on one side is more because of the missing limb, are you a complete fuckwit or do you just like starting arguments ya gimp?

pooliecrab · **Joined:** Tue Dec 16, 2014 9:31 pm **Posts:** 6028

Oscar Pistorious had little trouble leaning over to reach for his gun. He also had little trouble sprinting at the olympics but one legged people probably can't do that either.

Gibsons Beard · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 9:03 pm

Not as lean as sir Ritchie

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Gibsons Beard · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 9:03 pm

Damn auto-correct

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Mr Irrelevant · **Joined:** Thu Aug 17, 2006 8:25 pm **Posts:** 22676

Gibsons Beard wrote:

Not as lean as 'Beetroot Faced Badge Kisser'

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Tewatttttt.....

ptbap · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 9:18 pm

Now your just targeting disabled people. Sheesh, that's simply NOT funny.

monkeybutt · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 9:21 pm

Chip Fireball wrote:

Was she in a wheelchair* then before she stood up ?

* Not that this would make it funny either

Yes, by a hole in the wall machine, she said will you check my balance, so I pushed her over!

pooliecrab · **Joined:** Tue Dec 16, 2014 9:31 pm **Posts:** 6028

monkeybutt assaulting the disabled is one thing but your craic is criminal.

PJPoolie · **Joined:** Wed Mar 06, 2013 6:28 pm **Posts:** 15342

monkeybutt wrote:

PJPoolie wrote:

How would a person with one leg lean?

Hilarious stuff apart from it not making sense have you considered after dinner speaking?

When she stands up, the weight on one side is more because of the missing limb, are you a complete fuckwit or do you just like starting arguments ya gimp?

Sweet Jesus.

You've never really got this place or the concept of humour have you?

PJPoolie · **Joined:** Wed Mar 06, 2013 6:28 pm **Posts:** 15342

He reminds of the episode of The Simpsons were its the film festival in Springfield and Homer is on the judging panel and he insists on voting for 'Old Man Getting hit by a Football'

A really thick, puerile, crass version of Homer though.

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

PJPoolie wrote:

He reminds of the episode of The Simpsons were its the film festival in Springfield and Homer is on the judging panel and he insists on voting for 'Old Man Getting hit by a Football'

A really thick, puerile, crass version of Homer though.

viewtopic.php?p=735138#p735138

PJPoolie · **Joined:** Wed Mar 06, 2013 6:28 pm **Posts:** 15342

Oh look it's DJ.

mr elkots · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 10:04 pm

Who's DJ?

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

mr elkots wrote:

Who's DJ?

Been wondering that myself

mr elkots · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 10:21 pm

Are you down south now chip, or are you still on the central?

Loid Haw-Haw of Sussex · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 10:27 pm

Chip Fireball wrote:

He's a mate of Sussex.

Allegedly.

Right wing crank living down South, ex Darlo fan, and internet troller. Also allegedly a sexual inadequate.

No idea why folk would confuse him with Jizzer to be honest.

Never met him ,Chip.

Maybe you should take Pj down to Brighton and show him your favourite men sauna's,he does seem a little stressed out ..

mr elkots · **Posted:** Sat Jun 20, 2015 10:38 pm

Chip Fireball wrote:

I did say " allegedly " to be fair.

I'm in Brighton 2 weeks tomorrow, me and the family gonna kick start your economy. My daughters will spend enough on clothes to create a retail boom.

It's never been so good chip

glad you're doing well mate clappp

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

Chip Fireball wrote:

I did say " allegedly " to be fair.

I'm in Brighton 2 weeks tomorrow, me and the family gonna kick start your economy. My daughters will spend enough on clothes to create a retail boom.

Why go all the way to Brighton to buy expensive clothes when you have TK Maxx on your doorstep?

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

Since when has Birmingham been in The Cotswolds?

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

I don't think you've ever been to The Cotswolds, Chipolata.

Characterless?

poolieinnottingham · **Posted:** Sun Jun 21, 2015 10:21 pm

Where in the Cotswolds are you Jiz? Somewhere theme-parky like Bourton or Stow, or one of the less salubrious places?

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

It starts with 'Chipping'.

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

No, Chipolata, there's no such place as Chipping Kidderminster.

You can have Campden, Norton or Sodbury.

Or shop.

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

Well done to the comedic genius that added "Or shop" to my post above.

Why did you bother?

Dalton'sHaircut · **Joined:** Sun Oct 05, 2014 9:26 pm **Posts:** 1013

I actually thought you had written the 'or shop' part as a semi self deprecating piece of humour. The fact you didn't and object to it says it all really

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

If it was funny, I may have let it pass but Chipping Shop?!?

As I say, comedic genius.

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

Chipolata - you Lefties are very predictable.

Just like on Twitter or the Guardian website, anyone who stands up to Lefties is a Troll.

I know it's simply because your sort don't like your political views being subject to scrutiny. And for good reason.

yloop · **Posted:** Mon Jun 22, 2015 12:37 pm

Chipolata is hilarious like.

tREE_wiTH_hAMStER · **Joined:** Sat May 19, 2007 11:00 am **Posts:** 20758

Chip Fireball wrote:

Some university did research into the type of people that spend their entire lives on social media and forums engaged in this sort of behaviour, and the findings were incredibly depressing. Though entirely predictable I guess.

I guess they were all sad kids with fuck all better to do?

PJPoolie · **Joined:** Wed Mar 06, 2013 6:28 pm **Posts:** 15342

yloop wrote:

Chipolata is hilarious like.

Proper side splitting.

Much funnier and on a whole new level to 'chipping shop'

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

Or changing Jez to Jiz.

tREE_wiTH_hAMStER · **Joined:** Sat May 19, 2007 11:00 am **Posts:** 20758

Jiz wrote:

Or changing Jez to Jiz.

But that one is funny.

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

Tree_With_Hamster wrote:

Jiz wrote:

Or changing Jez to Jiz.

But that one is funny.

To an idiot, I suspect it is.

alleztfc · **Posted:** Mon Jun 22, 2015 5:28 pm

No. I'm a postgrad, and found it hilarious. confised

...and apt.

MFR · **Posted:** Mon Jun 22, 2015 6:59 pm

Jezza is an arsehole, its true, one who on a deep level thrives on the attention of being labelled an arsehole, or indeed labelled anything. We are validating his existence by biting every time he posts his deeply profound missives. But it is strangely fascinating. Not as fascinating as why some UKIP / Tory fanboy feels the need to come on to a Pools message board and talk about anything none Pools related whilst trying to get us to guess where he lives. Fucking weird really but I guess it takes all sorts.

Chesssington · **Joined:** Fri Oct 31, 2014 6:36 pm **Posts:** 900

Chip Fireball wrote:

Still living in the Town, been working a lot in Berkshire last few months, but working from home or in Newcastle next couple of weeks.

Mr I has just moved to Kent I think, dunno how people can afford to live down there to be honest, property prices are fucking stupid.

There are areas of Kent that aren't that expensive, my assistant has just bought a 2 bed house for £140,000. It is in Gillingham mind and her annual travel card is over £4,000 pa to get to work

Jiz · **Joined:** Fri Feb 06, 2015 5:50 pm **Posts:** 299

alleztfc wrote:

No. I'm a postgrad, and found it hilarious. confised

...and apt.

I've seen your posts and you are definitely an idiot.

I'm at a loss why you think anyone with a degree can't be an idiot. In addition to you, The Labour Party is evidence they can be.

monkeybutt · **Posted:** Mon Jun 22, 2015 7:58 pm

Chesssington wrote:

Chip Fireball wrote:

Still living in the Town, been working a lot in Berkshire last few months, but working from home or in Newcastle next couple of weeks.

Mr I has just moved to Kent I think, dunno how people can afford to live down there to be honest, property prices are fucking stupid.

There are areas of Kent that aren't that expensive, my assistant has just bought a 2 bed house for £140,000. It is in Gillingham mind and her annual travel card is over £4,000 pa to get to work

In comparison to a 2 bed house in Hartlepool for 70k it is

Loid Haw-Haw of Sussex · **Posted:** Mon Jun 22, 2015 8:07 pm

Aye, but you get to live longer down here..fact

Mr Ripper · **Posted:** Mon Jun 22, 2015 8:35 pm

You'd need to in order to pay your mortgage off.

Loid Haw-Haw of Sussex · **Posted:** Mon Jun 22, 2015 8:38 pm

Mr Ripper wrote:

You'd need to in order to pay your mortgage off.

And enjoy our pensions mr ripper.

monkeybutt · **Posted:** Mon Jun 22, 2015 9:23 pm

Mr Ripper wrote:

You'd need to in order to pay your mortgage off.

You need a mortgage to get a pikeyvan

Funny moment....

Gadgies online