Just thwarted an attempt by three fat 11-12 year olds to use the rustiest pair of 1950s shears to cut a carbon fibre bike lock and steal my housemate's mountain bike. From outside my window.

The weirdest thing? Just as they waddled away down the street, a Community Support Officer was walking up the opposite end. Flagged her down, very professional, not much different from a usual police officer - she couldn't do anything about it (not that I'd want the kids to have anything but a bollocking by their parents like).

Still, strange coincidence - it's the first bob on the beat I've seen the entire time I've lived in Leeds and it couldn't have been at a better time.

They just drive about nowadays. no point walking around.

CSO's are as much use as HobbyBobbies

ACAB

Looks like a standard fare slag. Why, what's special about her, used to be a copper?

not a copper no, i was nobbing her when i was 16.

works in the corner house, or did.

I'll inform the press shall I, MRC??

You do seem like quite the catch!

The comment was so non sequitur, I had no idea how to respond.