Shoot people in the balls.

Make sure all your flesh is covered and you will only get bruises.. IF they manage to hit flesh enjoy the big fkkkk off blood blister

Errrmmm....I'm afraid it does.

Before you go, play 'Paintballs Coming Home' by the mighty Biscuits!!

'They've got a German Shepherd dog called Prince,
The one called Sheba died...............'

If by 'good laugh' you mean running around with a load of people who can't even get into the Territorial Army, getting cold and soaked to the skin and being covered in bruises, you'll have a whale of a time

PS

No alcohol consumption is allowed neither.....

Really good fun Mutters!
I'd reccomend a Baseball cap and wear it backwards too! That way it cushions the blow if you get shot in the head, Cos it bloody hurts if you do get hit in the head!

Are you meeting at ours at 11o clock Mr Mutley.

Will you be wanting red sauce mr muts.

'N'if I'd a known they were coming, I'd have slashed me wrists......'

At the end of my wedding do, when you have one of them songs where everyone puts their arms on each other's shoulders (usually to 'New York, New York'), we played 'Paintball's Coming Home' instead. We'd asked for B and Q vouchers as gifts you see.

Quality.

In fact, I'm going to dig out our wedding do playlist and put it on here for perusal.

Rather than have a shite dj playing Grease Megamix and Come on Eileen, me and our lass hired a couple of amps and played what the fook we wanted all night. It was superb.

It Would be a shame if you got shot in the face and balls mutley

My first instinct is to sneer but there is a certain intensity and excitement in getting shot at. I've never done paintballing but I'd suck off a tramp for the chance to do the real thing again.