Just need to be lucky enough to get the beauts now!

Bring on 6 days of sunshine and psychedelic pear cider!

Sweet as

No need for registration,I will be stewarding on the disabled viewing platforms again.

Or a week of slopping about in energy draining mud, standing up in a puddle watching fvery ordinary performances from the likes of Neil Bloody Diamond (honestly!!) abandoning your tent and going home covered in hepatitis B carrying cow dung stew!!

OR

Having a brilliant time. Checking out bands that I wouldn't normally get to see as we're stuck in the armpit of the country (in terms of gigs). Taking on any kind of cuisine that you can possibly think of. Checking out all of the festival and not just the music (so much to do and see). Being part of the biggest and best music festival in the world and possibly the years biggest social gathering. Getting away from the rat-race and forgetting about it for a short time.

It doesn't rain every year (despite what the media thinks) and i couldn't care less if it does. If i get tickets it'll be my 7th visit to Worthy farm and i've enjoyed every minute of it. I would genuinely rather go here for my holidays than anywhere I can think of.

Everything is too commercial now though, isn't it?

To be honest, I prefer the way it is now to when I first went when there was stabbings sexual assaults, threats from pi$$ed up and drugged up scallies and blatently open drug dealing.

God, I must be getting old

What's the difference between pear cider and perry?

Ah well, maybe I got cynical about it, having not missed since 1997 up to 2006. I only liked it by the end before it actually opened to the public. I only got two sunny ones in that time and then the dust was a bugger!!

As Mr Mutley says, since Mean Fiddler moved in it has been full of Tarquins and Annabels and became Glaaarrssstonbeereehhh... It's next on the circuit after Wimbledon.

That's almost the same run i've had. My first was 1997 (Rain). Then 1998 (worse rain). 1999 (almost complete dryness for the 5 days I was there and possbily the most fun i've ever had over 6 days). 2000 (rained once for about 5 minutes on the Saturday) 2002 (completely dry and brilliant as a result) and 2004 (lots of rain).

It's roughly 50 / 50 looking at my experience. It's much better when it's dry but it's still fun when it's wet / muddy.

As for the posh kids, they were there in 1997, but were far outweighed by petty criminals, scumbags and drug dealers. It's no coincidence you notice the silver spoon brigade more after they put up the super-fence to stop the freeloaders.

Aye well, we had a most unpleasant time with the chavs over the bars of course, but at least they understood 'foo k off...' from a big Glaswegian security bloke whereas the Sloanies try and pay with credit cards and ask for receipts and bastad ((c)ADG) Pimms and look most miffed when a Poolie bar manager says 'foo k off....we sell lager for cash..........'

'Oooeewww...bat thet means I hev to gew ohl the weeyy to the keshpoint......'

yes, damn those south africans

I know what you mean like. They annoy the living shyte out of you. (not the South Africans, the posh sods)

I can remember watching England play Portugal in 2002 on the big screen at the Pyramid Stage. (the one where Beckham put the ball about 50 miles over the bar from the spot). Obviously a lot of people down in the dumps afterwards.

On my way back to the tent, some Tarquin decided to say to me and my mates "cheer up buddies, worse things happen at sea"

As much as i'm not overly @rsed about our national team, I could have punched the tw@t square in the mouth purely for saying buddies

I usually spend the week blissfully blaked so I tend not to notice them once the booze is flowing.

I should have put, 'in a high whiney Sloaney voice....'