home or away - vote and advice

the antitheist · **Joined:** Mon Aug 21, 2006 10:58 am **Posts:** 243

Who here would work away from the area if there was quite a huge pay hike invlolved? is there a limit to how much additional money you would require or would you not consider it at all?

What would be your reasons for not going, kids, football, wife, love of the area?

My dilemna is I have been offered a job, it is just about double your money but it is in London and I will need to commute and stay there 4 nights a week. On one hand I would miss the next 2 years of my kids growing up and the midweek football, on the other hand I could wipe out all my debt and pay off a large chunk of mortgage for 2 years hardship?

Discuss

Salty · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:15 pm

lifes too short

become a window cleaner instead :)

Mr Ripper · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:18 pm

Personally I want to be home every night.

I could get work away from home tomorrow if I wanted it, either in the UK or abroad, and there would be a substantial pay hike involved but it doesn't interest me.

I've worked away before and will only do so again if there isn't any work at home. Money is only of partial relevance, ie if you are getting enough now then why chase after a bit more. My priorities are seeing the Mrs every day and going to Pools for both weekend and midweek games.

Saying that I've worked with plenty enough blokes in the last few years who want to work away from home all of the time. They think that it is better not to see their wives, kids etc and instead go out on the lash every night after work, tart about, get drunk and stagger back to their digs.

I suppose it is each to their own really.

parmopooly · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:21 pm

just get the six numbers on your lottery ticket to match up with the numbers on the balls on Saturday... and bingo you've won the bing..er.........
I don't know really.
I would have considered moving away if I was single and that....but it depends how independent your missus is. I know our lass would not like it if I moved away, but then having the pub business has ensured that it's not an option for me.
If push came to shove and the family thinks it's going to be better for the long run, then get everyone's agreement. Have a meeting, and include the kids if you can, and discuss all the options as a family. That way nobody will feel as if they haven't been consulted on the issue.

Mr Ripper · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:22 pm

parmopooly wrote:

If push came to shove and the family thinks it's going to be better for the long run, then get everyone's agreement. Have a meeting, and include the kids if you can, and discuss all the options as a family. That way nobody will feel as if they haven't been consulted on the issue.

And if the wife wants you to go then start to wonder why!

the antitheist · **Joined:** Mon Aug 21, 2006 10:58 am **Posts:** 243

parmopooly wrote:

just get the six numbers on your lottery ticket to match up with the numbers on the balls on Saturday... and bingo you've won the bing..er.........
I don't know really.
I would have considered moving away if I was single and that....but it depends how independent your missus is. I know our lass would not like it if I moved away, but then having the pub business has ensured that it's not an option for me.
If push came to shove and the family thinks it's going to be better for the long run, then get everyone's agreement. Have a meeting, and include the kids if you can, and discuss all the options as a family. That way nobody will feel as if they haven't been consulted on the issue.

part of the problem is that one child is 2 next month and the other is 10 weeks? If it wasn't such a huge hike it would be a no brainer but as it could seriously help wipe out all our debt and set us up a bit for the future I am tempted

Montpoolier · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:35 pm

I've never hestitated to work away if it seemed like a good opportunity.
In fact the last time it happened I never came back!
I must admit however that it was never in the Smoke. I'd have serious doubts about living in London.

parmopooly · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:41 pm

NO SURRENDER TO THE CSA !!!!!

Mr Irrelevant · **Joined:** Thu Aug 17, 2006 8:25 pm **Posts:** 22551

A difficult one but it sounds like you've already made your mind up. I went to work away a couple of years ago which caused no end of upset for my daughter. So much so that when I came home after a three month stint I didn't go back. Kids don't stay kids for long.

TheGingerPoolie · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 2:27 pm

Don't go man. Not with kids that age, you'll miss a lot, especially the big things in the ten week old one. Money can be gotten from anything, and if you find it was all a waste, you can always eBay one of your kids

aptid · **Joined:** Thu Aug 17, 2006 9:49 pm **Posts:** 1505

Whatever decision you take will be wrong in someones eyes and you will regret whatever decision you make at some time.

My advice for what its worth would be to stay at home........ because if you have to ask strangers for advice about a contract away from home you obviously aren't ready for it. :idea:

3Quid · **Joined:** Thu Aug 17, 2006 9:11 pm **Posts:** 1791

About 7 years ago i moved to London to work,at the time i had just split up with my ex and it seemed like the right time to do it,money-wise i was buckled as the wage i was getting down there was 3 times what i was getting up here and i wasnt paying to live anywhere either :grin:

(i moved into my dads pub).

The only problem was i had a 3 year old daughter up here and i missed her like mad :cry: i managed to get up to see her only twice and my mam brought her to see me twice,but it was so sad when i had to go back to London or when my mam took her back home.I suppose the ideal situation would be if you could take your family with you...but you cant always do that.

Anyway,after a year i sacked it and moved back up here :grin:

and went self-employed....best thing ive ever done.

You wouldnt get me to live in London now for a gold pig!

the antitheist · **Joined:** Mon Aug 21, 2006 10:58 am **Posts:** 243

Cornelius Atweasle wrote:

I worked away for 10 years for mega money. It cost me my marriage and missing out on my kids growing up.

Like ECG said, it's only money.

So what your saying, from the east wing of your palacial abode and just before you take one of the jags out is, don't do it? :laugh:

the antitheist · **Joined:** Mon Aug 21, 2006 10:58 am **Posts:** 243

Cornelius Atweasle wrote:

Just offering my advice, cunntt-face.

harsh but fair, i was pulling your plonker fella, the advice is gratefully received.

the antitheist · **Joined:** Mon Aug 21, 2006 10:58 am **Posts:** 243

chip fireball wrote:

i would go if i was you. its not like you are on about moving there and lets face it by the time you get in from work at the moment, kids that age would be getting ready for bed anyway. sounds to me like you will be seeing them 3 days a week. you will appreciate your time with them all the more.

however you look at it the fact is during the week most working dads spend more time with their workmates than they do with their kids. in fact some people are having to do overtime to make ends meet and dont see their family much at all. if your missus is genuinely okay with it as a short term measure and it will make that much of a financial difference it may be worth it to give you the security you need.

the bottom line is that you are only 3 hours away on the train

Thanks Chip, I suppose your right about the kids. They are that young at the moment I get to spend about an hour a night with them then it's off to bed (for them :grin:

) so I would be missing out on 4 hours a week.

parmopooly · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 5:56 pm

the message boards have eyes Phil, I know our lass reads this lot!!!! :)

dawlishmonkey · **Joined:** Fri Sep 01, 2006 11:53 am **Posts:** 1588

depends on what motivates you. personally I would go for it ,take every opportunity.seeing the family for that time each week can be a benifit to you,you lose some of the drudgery daily grind stuff but you gain having loads to catch up on and your kids actually looking forward to seeing you.
But if you will be debt free in 2 years think of the better future life you can give your kids.
And if you turned it down would you be sat at home one night thinking what might have been ?

Cowboy · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 9:02 pm

As has been said it depends what you want

I wouldn't do it, I would miss the Kids & wife too much

Would probably ruin my liver as well - nothing else to do on a night & surrounded by blokes saying "fancy a pint tonight" big chunk of the extra money would go over pub bars

katcha · **Posted:** Mon Sep 11, 2006 11:03 pm

i'd do it - even tho i'd miss family purely because i wouldnt miss em at same time

home or away - vote and advice

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