Edited to protect this stupid poster from getting the kicking of a lifetime.

If you must get drunk take her for a meal first

I DONT THINK YOU SHOULD HAVE GOT DRUNK BEORE YOU TRIED TO POST THAT SERIES OF QUESTIONS

Shag her first off and then if she gets fed up at how much you're knocking back, it doesn't matter anyway. If she's unsure about this course of action, go down the 'working an appetite up' road without disclosing that your appetite is for bevvy and not necessarily grub. Get some bread and Kraft cheeses slices in for if she gets peckish later over the carry out. Maybe some Skips or Quavers or Pickled Onion Monster Munch an' all. Put a bit of a spread on, seeing as she has eh??

She's a lucky lass.

It's only pain mate, it goes away quickly once the bones knit!!

What was said originally then?

you are too young mr fens

First time someone has said that to me for years

Right Mr P, spill the beans......

Full graphics too please, no beating about the bush. Well not unless you did actually.......y'know, beat about the bush...