Every time without fail and I have seen this over a dozen times, when the weedy bloke is trying to get the beefy guy off the phone at the motel in Dumb and dumber, on tv now, makes me chuckle

All of dispicable me 1 & 2.

Too funny for kids


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Austin powers reversing that vehicle in the tight corridor always raises a chuckle.

Many a time I've said to our lass when reversing "steady on your doin an Austin powers here"


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Cassandra's dads fly kick in waynes world 2! Hilarious

Love the handsome dan bit on Wayne's world 2


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

roller coaster scene in the Probation Officer

Loads of bits in Rita, Sue and Bob Too, particularly the confrontation scene with Bob's wife in front of the blocks of flats.

Step Brothers "cock rubbing on the Drum Kit" scene.

Not a film but the dead bullfrog bit on family guy always has me in creases.

cant remember the scene exactly, but it was in Silence of the Lambs.

National lampoons Vacation, the scene when the camera goes around everyone in the car showing them all asleep, including driver Chevy Chase

Silent bob killing the shit demon in Dogma

really simple and daft, but it gets me every time

The American Elephants in 'In Bruges'!!!!

you are all wrong.

The funniest film scene ever is..........and this is FACT....................

National Lampoons Animal House, the fake shooting of the horse scene.

John Wayne's speech at the end of Fort Apache. Or at the end of any film he did come to think of it.

Mike Bassett - 3 cheers for Ramirez

Chevy Chase is a comic genius!

Pretty any scene from Blazing Saddles, especially the mongo bits:

Dodgeball - When the guy in the wheelchair starts throwing wrenches etc and says, duck, dive, dodge, pretty much most of Dodgeball is funny tbh.

Dumb and Dumber - where he makes the "most annoying sound in the world"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KAWoP1kncRE

Sky Atlantic 10pm tonight!

This..... http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Vs9yhpMTGxc

Most of Freddy Got Fingered. Top of the shop.

The piano/sausage contraption, jesus fuck

told yers. Its this.

Watched this last night, I was going to say the airport scene with the Scottish and Irish squads.

No fillum has ever made me want to Lick Old Ladies.

No but 6 pints of strongarm has

This scene from Turkish Rambo had me laughing because of how bad it was.

The kids I teach told me about it, the rocket launcher sound effects and death scenes are ace.


Can't get the blooming youtube link thing to embed on here......

All of Mississippi Burning. A great feel good film!

C'mon, come clean, you were bummed by an African American, weren't you?

http://youtu.be/j-fcMS5x3Mw

The bit on the burbs with Tom hanks where the army guy falls off the roof. And the scene in dumb and dumber where the blind kid is stroking the dead bird.

If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating and yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master; If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim.
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster and treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken, twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken and stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings and risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings and never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew to serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue. Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch.
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, if all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it, and—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

Ladies and Gentlemen, England will be playing; four, four fucking two!

They're meant to be horrors but pretty much every scene from the Evil Dead Trilogy. They're hilarious.

Kenneth Williams in carry on....Infamy infamy they've all got infamy. Genius.!!!!!

"I'm not managing the band with you or any other woman, especially one who dresses like an Australians nightmare" The "Stonehenge" scene in "This is Spinal Tap".

Steve Martin When He Hires A Car From The Fat Bitch In Trains, Planes & Automobiles Near The End Of The Film

The work song scene at the beginning of Blazing Saddles

The dog frozen in planes trains and automobiles

The "welease woger" scene from Life of Brian. Comic genius from Michael Palin!

In fact, most of the scenes from this film, got to be my favourite of all time.

Or the bit where he stops playing a really lovely composition, inspired by Mozart and Bach, and when asked the title Tufnel blandly replies "Suck My Love Pump".

In 'Riff Raff', when the builder character played by Ricky Tomlinson sneaks into the luxury show flat for a bath and a load of arab women walk in on him whilst being shown round by the estate agent. He's stood up naked in the bath holding his hard hat over his genitals, and mumbles 'I'm just checking the plumbing'.

In the same film, when one of the other builders nicks the mobile phone off the twat foreman and launches it off the top of the block of flats.

Austin Powers 1 - toilet in the casino scene

"Who. Does. No.2. Work. For?"

"That's right, Buddy, you show that turd who's boss"

https://youtu.be/J-YVt4gfquA

Thought I'd give it a go....flicked through it and just found it infantile with gross sick sick sexist 'humour'....words cannot describe how offensive that 'Film' is!!!!

I for one will not be flicking through it again....but how fecking nice is 'Betty' the nymhopmaniac wheelchair user....played by the adorable Marisa Coughlan eh????

Really really pretty....googling her now to see if she has been in anything else....(please God let her to have started out in porn to get her foot in the door and if so I hope you have made everyone seed it so it takes only seconds to download etc....thanks God)!!!!

No such luck....been in loads of films and done masses of TV work....but never started out in Porn to better herself and put herself on the Map....talent completely wasted....Fiddlesticks!!!!

Cheers God for building my hopes up....thanks for nothing....puff!!!!

I have actually just had a read of her 'Biography' on RottenTomatoes....not to impressive like....but she is really sweet looking and I bet she's dead nice in real life....I'd go out with her me like*!!!!

*I wouldn't want nothing too serious like so she can forget about that!!!! I'm just getting use to coming home to a Flat with no-one else in it but shouting 'It's only me'....and watching every episode of Grand Designs (all 11 series's) on me own within a 2 week period....might sound sad but you'd be wrong!!!!
I totally enjoyed making my Top 10 of Grand Designs Greatest Grand Designs....it was like the Euro Vision Song Contest....but on your own....and it was houses....that the likes of me and me could only dream of renting!!!!
But my overall favourite was from series 2 or it could have been series 3....the Bloke and Woman from Huddersfield who made a house out of an old Warehouse/Mill type of building....it was cushty!!!!
And the thing that made so impressive was that this couple was just like you and me....they saw an old building and decided to make it their home....and they were just like us....salt of the Earth....dragged up on fat n bread etc etc....then made millions by buying stuff dead cheap and then selling it for more....how cool is that eh?!?! Just like anyone of us could do if someone gave us a kick up the arse!!!!
And the most impressive part of this old warehouse in Huddersfield that got converted into a Modern Home fit for the 20th Century by this millionare couple just like us but with loads of money is this....and I was astonished when Kevin McCloud said this at the end of the programme....this is what he said about this normal couple who done an old building up....his exact words....

'....to embark on a project like this takes courage and guts but not just guts it also takes courage. They had the vision of turning a derelict piss stinking shell into a magnificent family home fit for any family that needs 6 toilets in Huddersfield. But it wasn't about that....it was about a dream....a dream this millionaire couple made real!!!! Yes they had an endless supply of money and yes it helps to be a billionaire couple and yes it helps when the schedule starts slipping you can bring a new team in and....and this is where it all comes apparent and worth it and this where the likes of this well off couple ARE better off than us....they can Project Manage the Build themselves!!!!
This couple who are just like me and you differ in lots of ways from us....chalk and cheese some might say....but in every other they are EXACTLY the same as us!!!! This couple looked for a blank canvas....a wonderful space that lets in lots of light....and they found it in Huddersfield!!!! Ok they went over their budget by £375,000 and had to find another £750,000 just so they could say "we've just found another £750,000" and which allowed them to tile the bathroom on the 4th floor....if they never came up with that £750,000 this project was destined to fail and there would have been no tiles in the bathroom. But they pulled out all the stops and everything was finished on schedule and within budget....a triumpth for this couple with no previous experience of anything....at all!!!! Their 1st baby....Linnet Wallunit....was without a Pram/Pushchair for the first 4 years of his life cos they didn't know where the shops where....but that never stopped them and halted them in their tracks....they decided to make a bold statement by making a bold statement in the form of an old warehouse and turning it into a Futuristic house with all modern gear and hi-fi's and things and with a carbon footprint of only 63.0978....phew.... it would have just been easier to say 'Bugger Off' '....and this should be your inspiration....this normal couple....just like us....found an old building and spent loads on it and then they found another £750,000 after going over budget whilst over indulging themselves on 2 White Albino Peruvian Tigers for the garden....which incedently hasn't been budgeted for never mind budgeted for!!!! You might be sat their thinking to yourself....(it should be 'there' btw)....'I can't do that....I've just been laid off and our lass only gets 15 hours in 't' chippy a week....where will we find £750,000'!!!! And that's where we differ from this couple who are exactly the same as us....we share the same DNA....blood brothers....congeiled twins....blah blah blah etc etc FORGET IT...would you please allow me to be so bold as to suggest that we could even be cousins....twice removed!!!! That's us and that's them....The Same in every way....but they made their dream reality....they had a vision....they took a blank canvas....they turned it into this amazing space....and what a space....looking from here it sticks out awkwardly....struggling to fit in even blend in!!!! It's like the new boy at school....shitty and pathetic with nothing to say for himself....like a mouse with no vocal chords!!!! But looking from here the transformation is miraculous....a miracle some might say!!!! The lines are so straight that they aren't even lines....they just blend into the background....it's as if the Warehouse is floating ....seamless....with no seams showing!!!! And that sweeping staircase as you enter....your eye is drawn to it....like a magic eye picture thing....it's sweeping all the way up to the top....of the stairs!!!! And the light....it's so light....what an amazing space....the way how the light just seems to bounce off every surface that the light touches is truly mystifying....and is just downright bizzare when mixed with electric light bulbs!!!! Honestly....try it at home if you have the right tools....during the day open the curtains....if you are lucky enough to own a pair....but just say you have....open them and let that light flood in!!!! It casts shadows and light and makes you feel humid and floaty....it's like some kind of miracle that is unbelievble!!!! But now prepare to have your head blown off....the curtains are open and there is light bouncing and swaggering and dancing and touching and just amazing your senses....the most exhilirating feeling you have ever felt....now X's that by 100....switch the Big Light on aswell....and remember this is during Daysun not Moontime!!!!With the curtains been wide open which allows the light to bounce off objects that the light didn't even know was there you would think putting the big light on would be a waste of leccy cos it would make no difference....and to a certain degree you would be correct....but if we are talking 7000watts of bulb that's something completely different there like....a slight difference would be noticed by only a few....a slight few of the population....percentage wise we are talking about 6th 5ths....1 in 10....just over half of the population of the World have the ability to sense the BIG Light been put on during daylight in a brightly lit room with the curtains fully open....the Human Eye just hasn't evolved enough to percieve the subtle difference of a brightly lit room with the curtains open on a sunny day....as a whole we aren't advanced enough to take in the subtle differences in tone and lightness when someone puts the big light on under those conditions!!!! But scientists say that by the year 2679 3/4 quarters of the World's population....just under 50% (half)....will have evolved enough due to evolution to sense the subtle change in light due to the perigorghpy gland evolving in the frontal lobe to such an extent that our perception of light will be only surpassed by 1 species....the Gnu of South East West Asia....a beast so evolved and advanced and which became so sensitive to light that it grew wings to fly away from the Sun and legs so athletic and evolved that if it finds itself in a room with the curtains open it can flee as quick an horse to somewhere less bright....or fly!!!! But scientists admit that this is mainly guesswork but using logic and understanding of evolution they guess that this could happen in the near future....'I'm certain it will happen sometime in the future' said one prominent Professor of Science and winner of The Nobel Peace Prize of Literature Doctor Professor Karl Pullover. 'Sometime in the future' he added, 'light will be so light and our organs of sight will be so sensitive that we won't be able to open our sight glands without fear of going blind....I'm telling yeh'!!!!
So where does that leave our couple from Huddersfield????....they seem to have perfected and got the balance just right....the light in this room is light perfection....this couple have beat the odds....they now have a beautiful home and that is something that they should be proud of!!!! Why???? Because just 14 months ago their beautiful home was a shithole that stunk of piss and they have transformed it into this....a seamless clean lined which blends into the background type of home....a real home....but not just that....they used reclaimed tiles for the 6 bathrooms sourced from a former Council Swimming Pool in Dumbarton....which is a triumpth in itself and I applaud them for that but most of all this transformation was finished on scheduale and within budget....give or take £750,0000....and I applaud them for that....I really do!!!! They have proved that anyone can take their dream and make it into reality and I applaud them for that!!!! But most of all I applaud them for making a major breakthrough in Physics regarding light and curtains and have proven to the many sceptics of the World that Dimmer Switches aren't just something you see on films like Back To The Future....but they have shown that within 10 to 14 years every home will have Dimmer Switches....probably....and I applaud them for that!!!! They had a vision....and I can only applaud them for that!!!!
Next week I will be in Winterton and I will transform my Cell into an Art Deco Minimalistic Victorian Georgian Cell of the Future....and I applaud me for that....where's me scarf'????

Since this programme was made Kevin McCloud has been arrested for harrasing people outside of Supermarkets and asking how much they have went over budget. The harrassed weren't bothered about that really....'it was the smug fecking grin of his' whilst asking that got most backs up a spokesman said earlier last week.

Since the above was typed Kevin McCloud has been sentenced to 3 years prison time for a term of 3 years. Whilst sentencing McCloud Judge Canary said 'I hereby sentence you to 3 years for been very very smug....and I applaud myself for that'!!!! The public Gallery applauded aswell.