Oh joyous day! My ship has finally come in after all this time!
I have just received this wonderful news by e-mail:

Assalamalekum,

My name is Abdul Ibrahim, legal practitioner with Abu and Associate, Accra Ghana. A late client of mine, Mr. Rafic Baha El Deen Al-Hariri,former Prime Minister of Lebanon.

I am contacting you to assist in investing the money valued $800,000,000. 00 left behind by my late client who died February 14, 2005 (aged 60)
Beirut, Lebanon. Before the death my client, he introduced me to one his personal assistant who is also a Lebanese whom both of them came together during the time they brought the money in to my country. Note that the Lebanese guy is now presently in my country with me, both of us agreed to look for a capable business man in the Arab world that will help us to invest this money in a profitable venture. This Lebanese man does not want to be in front of any investments of this regards for security reason.

In this regards, I will like you to come over here in Ghana for I, you and the Lebanese guy to have meeting together and sign agreement on how we are going to share the profit of the investment.

Please bear in mind that this is a highly confidential transactions that will be between two of us.

In Sha ' Allah." your interest in this transaction will be highly appreciated

Regards,

Advocate Abdul Ibrahim.
Legal Practitioner

Instead of profiting personally from my windfall, I propose to split the bounty in two, donating one half to the poor souls in Haiti, and giving the other half to the wretched Darlington FC.

God knows, they are a worthy cause