Just back so here goes.
It started badly from Liverpool John Lennon Airport and then just gradually got worse with 2 defeats out of 2.

Getting through security to departure side took 50 Bloody minutes resulting in a mad dash to the departure gate to even take off, though even the pilot reckoned he was caught up in the backlog. So took off at about 6:45am as opposed to 6:25am.

Arrived in Amsterdam and thought well here we are, through passport control and let's get sorted. Only for Fetish Bob's son to be hauled away to a second security check as his picture in his passport was loose. Thankfully he was allowed in and returned to inform the other 4 that he was the token white in the area people were being held for further checks. While he was sat there the security man called something like Abdul Hakim Qadeer out and looked at him expecting him to get up. Well anyway he is allowed in and we move on.

Into Amsterdam Schipol train station to find that the cheap Zommer travel tickets are no longer that cheap and can't be bought for a number of days travel and only 2 people per ticket as opposed to 3 in previous years. Ever thought you had had a bad idea , because at this moment in time I am. Tickets got we on train and we arrive at Amsterdam Central and head to our apartments which we know as I had stayed 2 years previously, only to find that at about 10:30 that it wont be ready till 1pm, ok so what shall we do , we all agree let's hit the nearest pub, 2nd bad idea after deciding to go in the first place. We begin drinking, and first round is 25 euro for 5 beers(pints) the equivalent, near enough of £5 a pint.But we decide not to let that phase us and carry on, yet another bad idea.A fellow
poolie paid 15 euros for 2 bottles magners approx £15

We drink till approx 1pm go to apartment freshen up and off back out.

We reach the venue for the fixture and the 40 or so Poolies watch as the 2 teams enter the pitch each player holding hands with a small mascot, and then the National Anthems of the 2 countries are played, yes that's right Pools' are there ready to play and are singing God save the queen, Pools in the champions league or a pre season friendly ????????

The beer carries on flowing and by now we buying Pitchers to save a little money and 2 of the "Boys" are drinking a Rose coloured lager. A local comes up and asks them

" Why you drink Ladies beer" ????

See Wednesday Hartlepool mail one of them is in there caught on camera, stuck in local paper, and currently on sick leave from work. Well I get the score right up to 2-0 down (keeping people at home up to date ) I then send 2-1 and 2-2 only to be told you coming back only 1 goal down , No I reply score 2-2 in my best Steve McLaren Dutch accent, no we score 3rd just after half time I'm told. O well guess time to tell boys in blighty, even though I'm at the game I don't know the F****** score. Hence I cant get a full report on the game on this up date. A mess about on the pitch after the game and then we head back.

More heineken is sunk as we sit on the train with some fellow poolies. Our female compatriot Miss Tigga (known to many on here) Decides a few stops from Amsterdam to visit the toilet , minutes before we pull into some station or another. Still not known to even her as she coming back from toilet she decides to embark the train, to then knock on the window with a big grin on her face and wave to us. Questions are asked, "Why is Miss Tigga on the platform waving to us and smiling well that question doesn't need answering as her smile turns to one almighty frown as she carries on waving and it for real this time as the train pulls out of the station. It's at this point that Orange O2 vodaphone and all other mobile phone operators start to make their money out of us as we start making phone calls.

Luckily we know the time of the next Amsterdam Central train, Miss Tigga is informed and told we will wait at Amsterdam central for her arrival, all sorted or so we think. F****** wrong again. Miss Tigga hasn't quite worked out that it not the next train she wants but she gets on it anyway. More phone calls ensue. Miss Tigga is now well and truly lost, so it reverts to Plan B get a taxi (20 euros) later Miss Tigga is in Amsterdam. But not at the train station though close, another phone call ensues and 4 blokes sober up fairly quickly as Miss Tigga tells Fetish, I'm really scared now" no nothing to do with me she is still lost remember.
And we begin running in what we hope is the right direction, and "saving Miss Tigga" goes in to action as fetish Bob's son takes off like Linford Christie, hurdling red and white road closed barriers like Colin Jackson. Its a perfect ending as within minutes we are reunited. My memory fails me here I'm not sure if we decide to sink more lager or head back. Tuesday is more refined as we decide to only take our time with the drink and have a stroll around. We find a cafe and eat where a non member of this board, one of the "ladies drinks" boys decides to have the unlimited spare ribs of the menu and proceeds to eat 2 that almost cover a reasonably large plate and then order another and another, along with the chips and salad from the first one. Apart from that the "gang" is well behaved and return home to freshen up before having a couple more and a fairly early night.

We have at least managed to make the day of the last game and set off at 1;27pm on the train. A stop over in Leeuwarden centre and beer and then the game . The venue a F****** 50 minute walk away, then when we get there a 7 euro admission charge (£7 approx, ) and they only charge 10 euros for there league games, could it be worse. Simply YES. The programme has Porter Moore Barron Budtz Barrett MaCunnie (that's how they spelt it so it not a typo from me) and other's no longer with us, to many to remember. Well nothing more can go wrong can it. WRONG AGAIN. They don't have pint glasses, they don't have half glasses they got plastic cups the size you get on water cooler's and charge us 1:50 euro for it. Then we lose 4-2 o well we home tomorrow anyway so back to Amsterdam, so with help from a local steward taxis are booked and off we go back to station. Arriving back in Amsterdam at 00:01am. Yes it's been nearly 11 hours to watch a friendly in some 1 horse cowboy town. A couple more beers , and bed to be up at 6am, except 3 of us decide to have one more, only for the barman to say we shut , the doors are locked but you can stay if you want. At last some good luck we have a locky back in Amsterdam we crack at 2.

Today goes well and we get home no hold up's in airport.

So how did the team actually look?????

Well as I said I cant remember much of the first game though Jones did well in first half and Sharples at left back seemed steady, this was also the case with him in the 2nd game. Flinder's some decent saves, but jury still out IMHO at the moment. centre half's of Clark and Hartley some work to be done there for an understanding to happen caught out to far apart for about 2-4 goals conceded. Austin once again, and as friendlies will give some leeway to him but thought he was knocked off ball little to easy in 2nd game. Humphreys played number of positions and looks like he will be what many, myself included, think on here, a player from the bench that can play a number of positions if needed. Was doing well until caught in face and on hamstring. Rowell played well again when called on and looks like could be pushing for a place, Boyd, Mackay struggled from what remember in 1st game, and we didn't really ever look threatening regardless of who was up front in either game (Brown needs to be in) rest of players nothing to write home about and nothing really to be totally down hearted in, it is pre season and it about getting ready and fit for 1st game of season.

May well be my last tour in Holland, although enjoyable long journeys to games and the increased prices , no longer make it look as inviting as it was. Maybe finding a location outside of Amsterdam and closer to venues would help, but at this moment in time it looking like a no for me next pre season, though knowing me once someone puts the idea forward i will probably say yes.

Worth going if you not been and if few of you to enjoy.

Well that's it from Holland, tried ta little light hearted though the events described at the start are the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

As always anything else comes under the "WHAT GOES ON TOUR STAYS ON TOUR" Scenario.

But to stop gossip , inuendo etc, nothing did happen outside what has been described.

I guess whatever happens next season will be anti-climax after that, especially for Miss Tigga

Well, I'm going to be honest, Bob, that report of your trip makes me think that that was a complete disaster.

Is there anything you can say that will convince me to the contrary?

Never mind all that , tell me about the ladyboys !

Can't be a disaster we set off got there watched both games got home. Other things where mishaps that make up a away trip, you want try it with a few mates one day POK, it's what football all about.

you're joking he can't even get to Vic when he's offered free bed n bawd!!

By all means, I would...I'm not a cheapskate, but the equivalent of £5 for a pint over there at the moment, more expensive train tickets etc, isn't exactly an attractive offer to some people.

More expensive train tickets than 2 yrs ago but still reasonable, we got all day travel for the game on Wednesday for approx £24 per person. Yes the beer is over the top price wise but at the end of the day when on holiday you just pay the going rate even though you moan about it.The reason I stuck that info in was in case anyone was considering going over sometime in future, stag do, hen party etc, that they would be aware that the cost of a night out is not as cheap as it was and they could budget for it.

And remember you were offered basically a free weekend in Pool, bed provided along with a ticket for the West Ham match yet turned it down to watch it on TV. So can I presume your very cautious with your expendable expenditure, so any info like that you would be grateful for. So by it being posted by me , you are aware of prices in Amsterdam and so is anyone else who may be thinking of going, giving them the option of looking elsewhere for maybe less. The money part of the trip is totally irrelevant to me, if it had been I wouldn't have gone in the first place for 2 friendlies

The cost of a lady of the night would probably have gone up as well but as I didn't visit one I cant put them prices on here for anyone whose interested can I.

Personally, if I'd wanted a drink, I'd have gone into a supermarket in Amsterdam and bought some cheap booze there.

No, I'd get something for myself and whoever was coming along could buy their own beer in the supermarket and we'd all go back to the hotel.

There's your problem solved there.

Nice one....I thought I had you there POK!!!!





















So....when you go on Holiday....you'll find the nearest Supermarket....stock up with cheap Booze with your 'Mates'....and then sit in your room the whole weekend/week/fortnight....whilst having a wonderful time?!?!



Beware Magaluf....POK and his 'Mates' are on there way!!!!

Not, for the whole time, just for when you wanted a drink I mean. Of course you must go out and see the sights whilst there - what would be the point of going there if you didn't?

If you really wanted to try a local beverage that badly, then you pay for it.

By all means, when in Rome, do as the Romans do.

Nice but did you shag a bewer from the window displays.

No, he just wanked off in front of them
It's cheaper!

At a cost of 1 euro for a 25ml can then that worked out at same as pubs, it wasn't cheap compared to supermarkets to pubs in this country. And the views from the local pubs into the windows were far better, and they a bit like over here as well not to happy if youu buy drinks elsewhere then use their facilities to drink it.

And to whoever asked if I shagged a bewer in a window then see previous post where I state I'm unable to give the prices, which obviously means I didn't. And didnt do as British suggested, not in mixed company.

Something else I forgot in original post (wont start yet another thread), Miss Tigga was pulled to the side on way through for attempting to smuggle items out of the country.

But it wasn't drugs of any kind, she has placed a jar of Mayonaisse inside her bag and the X-ray picked it up as a liquid .

So is Miss Tigga about to become a major mayonaisse smuggling baroness. ??????

Fetish Bob. Give yourself a good backslap in the Corner Flag. What a boring monologue.

That is one of the stupidest things you've ever said on here.

stop talking to yourself

It's less stupid than paying 5 euros for every pint that you have out there.

I'd pay 100 euros a pint not to have to read some people's trash on here.

Just to add to Fetish Bob's original post, The trains in holland were brilliant, totally put ours to shame. For the local train going from Amsterdam to Alkmaar we had a kind of double decker train which was new,clean and even set off on time without randomly stopping halfway there for no reason ala how our local train does after Seaham station. It seemed to be the equivalent of our hartlepool to newcastle train but far far better.
Mind you i prefer newcastle to amsterdam, the dam was ok for the first half an hour or so but the smell of weed soon gets really annoying, it really is just an even more seedy version of blackpool.
I stayed in Bruges before we went to holland and loved that city. The film In Bruges is a classic too.

I got sick of reading about alcohol, is any part of the original post about Pools and if so can anyone cut and paste it for me?

The trains in Holland ran punctully the year I went to watch the pre-season friendlies - the only late one being the one the authorities kept back about ten minutes untill they rounded up and escorted a few lads to the station.

Poolies kicking off at Eindhoven.

Where in the title does it say the thread was about Pools