"Manchester United defender Rio Ferdinand and his fiancee Rebecca Ellison have arranged for a barn owl to swoop down the aisle and deliver their rings in a velvet pouch when they get married in August"

I MEAN WTF!!!
Have some of these people lost all sense of reality

If I was the barn owl I'd disappear with the rings and fence them.

I hope him and his wife never have kids, ever
They don't deserve them

Oh My Good God !!!! Whatever happened to avin a paige boy carryin the rings on a little cushion ????

They are both big TWITS TWOOS

I hope it coughs a pellet of vole bones and fur into the bride's face.

And then shits over Ferdinand's suit.

I've had that with a slice of bread and butter

my half cousin had this done at her wedding was a peice of crap trying to make their wedding more "classy" (fur coat and no knickers spring to mind), easy gig for the bloke who owns the owl like

if I was there I would let a mouse go just as the owl swooped in.
Let's see what the owl does then..............................

are you in the habit of carrying a mouse in your pocket like

I remember a car park attendant at Belle Vue, Donny, who used to carry out his work with a ferrit in his pocket. I think it was safe to assume he stank.

I would make sure I had one for something like that!!!!

As it happens my dad used to take his mouse to school with him when he was a nipper!!!
He put it in the desk, and when a girl in the class opened it up to have a look, she apparently screamed and dropped the lid on the mouse and killed it.
My dad had to be sent home as he then tried to strangle the girl concerned.
He had a bit of a temper as well, like!!!