have been to get sprayed an orange colour today, and more than likely had to pay for the privilege.

So did you have the balls to call them Tango and Fanta?

He could have worn them as ear rings and at least had an excuse for having smelly ears.

the locals in the Gillen Arms have been calling the wife Miss Mozambique

Erm...just a minute...why have they been sprayed with an orange colour?
Have they been naughty?

they went in a shop and asked someone to do it.......I don't understand it either.

And they probably paid for the privilege too.

Have you told them that you could have fked it up for free?

Women are obsessed with changing colour...our lass aked me to help her colour her her once ... she couldn't go out for two weeks, then had to seek 'professional help' to tone it down...I still have a picture of her stood out side Sandringham looking like a match

Some people will do anything to avoid buying the 2nd choice away kit.

Oo er Missus!

First thing the bewers do here when the sun peeps through is crank up an umbrella 'cos they think white is right and having a tan makes them look like country peasants.

So I explained about tanning salons last Saturday and they all thought I was taking the piss.....

After a long discussion, I think they were right....