today I had some thing "normal" to eat.
Ham cheese and onion toasties.

That's nothing short of a scandal!

Questions need to be asked...............

With curried Ice Cream for dessert

They do indeed....

Brown bread or white?

In a dedicated toastie machine, under the grill, or in the George?

Do you butter your bread?

it waqs a close run thing for these whether they made it into the machine, like

no butter on, no need when all the cheese melts. Otherwise the bread disintegrates!!!

Don't worry, I've got a tin of corned beef, Bombay Bad Boy pot noodle and large brown bread buns for dinner

I do miss a good sausage !!!
I know i know but how else do you put it
And Bacon, but mainly sausages...................ask for a sausage here and you get a fookin hotdog !

I'll give you £2 a bucket for your shite...it must be good for the garden.................. what's the 'smell' like............?

ask the wife when she goes into the bog after me!!!

You mean she can still talk coherently after the 'experience'...? .... I'll send the skip round tomorrow...a sealed unit.

sh estruggles to breathe never mind talk.............hang on a minute, Snowy I think I might know how to shut your lass up...you might need a gas mask though..............

.....women are worse than blokes at 'venting their tanks'....silent but deadly, a slight poot and you're dead.... the female fart is deadlier than the male.

Ditto Mr Parry, the bacon here is nice like, but they put honey in all the sausages or else they're made from chicken which is just sick.

Does that mean you can't tell the difference between honey and chicken, or that those are the only 'flavour' sausages available?