Their new advert featuring a 'schoolgirl' in a sexually suggestive pose.




http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/graphic ... nryan1.jpg

nothing wrong with that in my eyes.

I've....eeerrrmmmmm.......

The only dodgy thing about Ryanair is all the hidden extras you have to be on your guard against.
And I heard the other day on the radio they were increasing the amount you had to pay for an item of checked-in luggage (yes you have to pay extra for EVERY bag you check in and you can't just lump the whole family's belongings into one giant bag either else they get you on weight). They say the reason is to encourage people to use hand baggage more to save time. But you're only allowed 10 kilos of hand baggage aren't you. What they really mean is they have to keep introducing new ways of fleecing you to catch up with normal airline prices.

Nah, unless you're a bird, you can get away with under 10kg hand baggage for a week away.

I saw the funniest thing ever at Ryanair check in in Rome.

Couple in front, had a bag that weighed 25kg. So the bird says ' that'll be 13kg at 7 quid a kg, 91 quid excess baggage.' So this bewer says 'why?? we're allowed 12kg each, and I can lose a kilo out of that.'

Ryanair bewer says 'no, 12kg each in separate suitcases.'

So off this woman storms to the suitcase shop, newly set up for such eventualities, and pays 45 quid for a perfectly ordinary suitcase, available in Wilkinsons for 8.99 and opens the big case on the floor.

Out comes: a hairdryer, curling tongs, straighteners, heated rollers, ladyshave, a cosmetic bag you couldn't have jumped over, eight pairs of shoes, etc etc etc. She gave him his mucky shreds to put in his pocket and weighed in again. He was at 9kg and she was at 15kg, and the whole pantomime started again.

By this time, as you might imagine, the queue was getting a bit restless.....

Well OK, I shouted 'get a fookin' move on!!' as I was getting scared of missing a pre-flight pint.

At this point she was asked to move to one side so everyone else could get checked in and feigning sympathy I asked how long they'd been in Rome for......'just since yesterday' she said, 'it's our anniversary.....and it's so cheap on Ryanair....'

Fly Globespan always let Mrs R and I use our combined baggage allowance in one case.

Either they're more sensible or I've been lucky up to now.

What, you mean they let you travel in a suitcase??

Not me.

But it is much cleaner trying to get a body in one suitcase as opposed to splitting it between two.

Less cuts you see.



Did I tell you that we flew back from the Costa de la Luz last May?

Faro to Teesside, cheap as chips.

ahem, i'm an official authority on 'this sort of thing', and i can tell you categorically that there is nothing wrong with that


er, got any more you need 'checking' ?

Can't agree with you there Kev. I always travel light and when we go away for long weekends I could quite easily get away with just taking hand luggage. The only reason I don't is because of the restrictions of what you can take. You can't take electricals, aerols or liquids, etc as hand luggage, they have to go in the hold.

But most birds don't wear the same keks for a week...

I don't, but my arse isn't that big so a few pairs of pants don't take up much space.

Ahem....ever thought of buying on arrival......

Can't do that with hairdryers and mobile phone charges though can I?

No, but you can buy a hat and talk to the person you're with.........

Anyway, most hotels supply a hairdryer.

We're not posh enough to stay in hotels. We go away for a cheap long weekend every year and usually stay in a hostel. Cheap as chips. We're going to Frankfort this year and it's cost less than a ton for the flights and the accommodation put together.

And how much for putting your luggage in the hold??

Incidentally I really rated Penang.

Probably anout £200

I wasn't that fussy on Penang. Think it was cause I travelled around a bit and there was more to do at the other destinations than Penang. I still enjoyerd it though cause it was for my sisters wedding at the Rasa Siang* Hotel.

* - spelling

Ah right, didn't stay there, stayed at the Hydro.

The grub was the best I've had anywhere in the world though. Apart obviously from that cooked by my little Pearl Of The Orient here at home.....

Will someone pass me a bucket please!

If you want but we eat out of small bowls with chopsticks........

But I've got a big appetite!

OK you can have a spoon. It makes rice a bit easier. My in-laws piss themselves watching me eat rice with sticks.