1. tommy millers second a few years back.beats a few swivels and hits one into the top corner. won 2 1 that day

2. went with my mate irish dave that day. it was freezing as it always is in lincoln,so daves dressed in ireland rugby coat and green dutt. A pissed up poolie approaches stares at dave and his hat and says " what the fook you wearing that for" so dave says " to keep me head warm" drunken poolie stares for a second then walks away seemingly happy with the explanation.

3. speed cameras on that crappy road is it the a37 or 57.always seem to get stuck behind tractors on the way

4. one of my first ever away trips going way back.the local bobbies came on the coach and suggested that as it was a bit rough we shoould remove team colours and scarves as they couldn't guarantee our safety. then followed the usual poolie reaction of the whole coach strapping on anything blue and white marching through the town singing loudly all the way into the ground(including scarves tied round wrist thats how long ago it was) I hid somewhere in the middle wishing I hada nappy on!!

5. yep you're right about the siren,and they used to have a drum as well.

1 thing for me. Arriving late at an LDV game, missing the only goal and then watching another 85 minutes of shite. I hate that place.

1. My record at Sincil Bank is quite even - 2 wins, 2 defeats and a draw. Is a draw on the cards tomorrow to make it 2 of each?

2. There are loads of decent pubs within 10 minutes walk from the ground.

3. The ex-landlord of my local used to play for Lincoln City many years ago.

4. The sight of the cathedral up the hill must be one of the most impressive sights from a league ground, especially at night when it's lit up.

5. Their fans are the most annoying of any I've encountered - loads of chewy schoolkids with high-pitched voices gather in a big cluster. The 'Back to school on Monday' chant could have been written for this lot.

1. I also have a 100% record at Lincoln. 3 visits 3 defeats.

2. Dunham Bridge on the A57 ten miles out of Lincoln is possibly the best value toll bridge in England, a snip at 25p. AND they always have plenty of change.

3. There is a place just north of Dunham Bridge called Darlinton. I always meg out of the car window as I drive through it.

4. Incest is rife in Lincolnshire.

5. A man in Lincoln sued the Cathedral because his daughter was passed over to lead the choir in on a Sunday. They settled out of court by burning him as a heretic. I made that last bit up.

Pleased you said England. There's cheaper in Wales!

Crowd trouble! First game of the season a few years back, one Poolie spots another in the crowd who owes him money and a fight breaks out.

1. John Beck of dodgy whisky fame reading out their team in the supporters club pre-match and getting lots of Poolie abuse

2. Jon Cullen's wonder goal

3. Telling all of the tossers next to us that they were no longer top of the league after Jon Cullen's wonder goal

4. Wondering who the hell James Sharp was on the first day of the season down there

5. Lee Fitzpatrick scoring two goals, I think that it was the only time he ever did

1. There's a friggin' marina there, right in the middle of a town that's 30 miles from the sea!
2. Robin Hood used to buy his greens there
3. In their 2002/3 play-off final against Bournemouth, rain was predicted but they refused to close the Mil Stad's roof for fear of missile damage from Lincoln's hoofball merchants.
4. Lincoln pissed on our championship gallop in that same season (yes I know I keep saying that but it still annoys me! ).
5. Lincoln suddenly became good in the 1950s and played in the (real) 2nd division for ten years before coming back to the fourth with a thump. The last crowd to watch them at the Vic before they went up was over 11K. The first crowd to watch them at the Vic after they came back down was 2683.

I was there as well. Never seen us win there. It's a shithole!

1. James Sharp made his debut for us here, we all said James who.

2. The hot pork sarnies in the supporters club.

3. That stupid siren.

4. Tommy Millers wonder goal

5. My Nana also used to buy Lincoln Biscuits for dunking.