Got an email from an old mate this morning, he is 42 an still a serving soldier after 20 years. He has just passed the royal Marines all arms commando course at 42!!

After six weeks of seriously gruelling training you attempt to pass the tests. Bear in mind that by this stage your feet, ankles, knees and back are knackered.


The 6 Mile Speed March.
This test requires the recruits to complete a 6 Mile route, carrying full fighting order (31lbs including weapon) at a pace of 10 minutes per mile (60 minutes in total). They are then permitted to begin the Commando Phase of training. They then complete a series of Commando training packages such as cliff assault/military abseil training and amphibious assault training, which culminates in a raid from the sea and a night cliff assault.

To confirm the recruit is professionally prepared for life in an Operational Commando Unit and is at the level of fitness required for Commando Service. The recruit must prove he has the requisite qualities of determination, courage, unselfishness and cheerfulness under adversity. Having successfully completed all the training evolutions the Recruits are then required to undertake and pass the Commando Tests in order to complete the Commando Course.

The Endurance Course
Starting early in the morning trainees must complete a two mile course across rough terrain, which includes a host of obstacles including culverts, deep pools and an underwater tunnel. Then they run four miles back to Lympstone. At the camp they then fire their weapon on the range. They must achieve six out of ten shots on the target, otherwise they will have to do it again. All this they must do carrying full fighting order (31Ibs including weapon) Time: 73 minutes.

The Tarzan Assault Course
The Tarzan course is an aerial confidence test, which starts with a death slide and includes numerous obstacles high up in the trees. It culminates with trainees climbing a 30ft wall. The Assault course incorporates a dozen or more obstacles ending with a 12ft wall. Prior to taking the Tarzan Assault Course Commando test both the Tarzan course and the Assault course will have been completed separately earlier on in training but now they are joined together and the whole test finishes when the Recruit reaches the top of the 30ft wall. All this must be done carrying full fighting order (31lbs including weapon). Time: Recruits 13 minutes.

The Nine Mile Speed March
This test requires the Recruits to 'speed' march a total distance of 9 miles in 90 minutes (10 minutes per mile) carrying full fighting order and rifle (31lbs), Both Recruits and Officers must run as a squad or troop. Time: 90 minutes.

The 30 Mile March
This test consists of a 30-mile march or 'yomp' across Dartmoor carrying full fighting order, safety equipment and weapon. Starting early in the morning both Officers and recruits are split into teams or syndicates to complete the test in the time permitted. Time: 8 hours.

Piece of piss

What does the rest of the test entail?

drinking twenty-five pints of real ale and then wrestling a crocodile with your bare hands. Or is that the Australian army?

I had to do all that just to get home from fookin Vietnam the night before last. Throw various Immigration obstacles in as well.