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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 11:46 am 
56% of adult males smoke in China.

The security guards up at the Olympic Complex in Beijing confronted the contractors who were having a fag break inside one of the new buildings which will be a non-smoking area when it's opened to the public.

'Put them fags out,' they demanded. In Chinese. The contractors filled them in.

That's how to approach it. Indiscriminate violence is the only language they'll understand.

Make sure that your glass isn't more than 30% obstructive to natural light and then make sure each time you leave home in your car, you are wearing a Tony Blair mask. It's not illegal to drive in a Tony Blair mask.


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:01 pm 
ADG wrote:
Tony Blair mask? :laugh: :laugh:

Cornelius has a friend? :laugh: :laugh:

You two crack me up. rolfl rolfl rolfl rolfl


Yes. It would be FOOKIN HIL_AAAAARRRRRIIII-OUS if every speed camera photograph looked like a Spitting Image puppet of Tony Blair.

Wouldn't it?? :grin: :grin: :grin:


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:16 pm 
Or of course, Rolf Harris..................... :grin: :grin: :grin:


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 Post subject: Re: Another two stupid reasons why the country has gone to t
PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:44 pm 
ADG wrote:
dogs.

1. The new smoking ban.

Firstly, I dont smoke and never had. You can argue the case for a smoking ban all you want, but..................its here.

It is now illegal to smoke in any public building.

But my rant here revolves around this:

If it is now illegal to smoke in a public place..................why do business, van drivers etc etc, have to put compulsory "No smoking signs" up all over the place, and why do thye have to buy them? stpid stpid stpid

Not only that they/we can be fined for not putting them up, and constant offenders can be jailed. stpid stpid stpid stpid stpid stpid

2. It was reported this morning that tinted glass is to be banned from the drivers windows of all vehicles.

Again, I dont have tinted windows in my car, but:

A police spokesman interviewed on the radio this morning justified it by saying that it was unsafe, unless 70% natural light could get through the glass.

This new limit is to become law.

On further questioning, the spokesman admitted that the police need the 70% natural light for their speed cameras to be able to capture the image of the driver. stpid stpid stpid stpid stpid stpid

THE WHOLE FOOKIN COUNTRY IS BARKING MAD. stpid stpid stpid stpid



Sorry to be pedantic, but doesnt the ban start on the 1st July 2007??


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 Post subject: Re: Another two stupid reasons why the country has gone to t
PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:45 pm 
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ADG wrote:
2. It was reported this morning that tinted glass is to be banned from the drivers windows of all vehicles.



Tinted windows are a menace, and have no place in society :evil:

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:49 pm 
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I remember a story / urban myth possibly about two lads in Stoke I think, who pulled up behind a mobile police speed camera, while one lad distracted the camera operator by asking directions, the other lad nicked the reg plate from the back of the speed camera vehicle.

The spent the rest of the day driving at excessive speeds and the fines went back to the polis
clappp

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:50 pm 
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Cornelius Atweasle wrote:
What about tinted caravan windows?


Worse still

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 12:55 pm 
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What about sunglasses :sweeeet:

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 1:21 pm 
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Dugoutpaddy wrote:
I remember a story / urban myth possibly about two lads in Stoke I think, who pulled up behind a mobile police speed camera, while one lad distracted the camera operator by asking directions, the other lad nicked the reg plate from the back of the speed camera vehicle.

The spent the rest of the day driving at excessive speeds and the fines went back to the polis
clappp


Haha, I like it! There not called "Speed Cameras" though the politically correct term is 'Safety Camera' :roll: :roll:


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 1:33 pm 
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Let's see if I've got this right, there is going to be a ban on smoking smoked glass whilst wearing a Bony Tlair mask unless you're in a non working caravan in China.
Or have I misunderstood something.


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 3:02 pm 
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So are they going to ban driving in the dark next?


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 3:19 pm 
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The barstewards better leave my smoked bacon alone.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 4:04 pm 
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Pooliekev wrote:
56% of adult males smoke in China.

The security guards up at the Olympic Complex in Beijing confronted the contractors who were having a fag break inside one of the new buildings which will be a non-smoking area when it's opened to the public.

'Put them fags out,' they demanded. In Chinese. The contractors filled them in.


rolfl rolfl rolfl rolfl


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 Post subject: Re: Another two stupid reasons why the country has gone to t
PostPosted: Fri Jun 01, 2007 8:41 pm 
Mick Tait's Head Bandage wrote:
ADG wrote:
2. It was reported this morning that tinted glass is to be banned from the drivers windows of all vehicles.



Tinted windows are a menace, and have no place in society :evil:


they do for UGLY women :wink:


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