ok, just to clarify - it’s a totally biased review eh

fuck off everyone. why the fuck do i fucking bother.

i didn't go looking for this gig, i was asked. and from what i remember it went well. barney had a shit on stage but the kids love that. especially when i do the comedy slip in it eh. and i didn't fucking throw it at plod, but given the chance i would have rubbed it in that copper bitches face eh. she fucking hates me nearly as much as i hate her.
i feel a bit bad because the treasurer of the womens institute who asked me to come is really nice and friendly. she likes barney as well and to be fair i'd fuck her into next week eh. i tried to wangle a visit to her house to sort out the details so i could maybe go for a piss and look through her dirty washing but it was sorted out on the phone. looks like any chance of me sniffing her dirty crackers are fucked right out the window now though.

charity is fucking shit. paid fuck all to be arrested again.